Closing Time
by DaniBek
Summary: -My eyes kept darting between his full dark lips and enchanting green eyes. And it felt like forever as I waited for his lips to connect with mine. Well, forever was definitely worth the wait.- AU, AH of course and canon pairings.
1. Champagne Supernova

It was just another day.

I pulled my arms tighter around my chest as I realised I didn't look forward to anything anymore.

It was almost as if I was lost, in this massive swarm of parkas, jeans and scarves that was school.

West Seattle High was huge.

There was no possible way you could know everyone.

Not even if you tried. Even as I trudged through the packed corridors, I willed myself to put down all the faces to memory.

It was to no avail. No one stood out. And neither would I.

I snapped myself out of my musings as I reached for the handle of room 46. First period I always had trig.

At least Jess would dig me out of my rut.

There she was, her mousy-brown locks falling past her shoulders as she waved me over.

I just smiled back, I was careful not to let anyone see my inner hate of the world.

'Bella,' she greeted, her blue eyes shining, 'you'll never believe what I just heard.'

Yes, Jess liked to gossip.

It was my way of catching up on things around me.

I just grinned back enthusiastically, willing her to continue.

'James and Vic,' she raised both eyebrows in hinting, 'are together.'

I tried to look shocked, but really it was bound to happen. Victoria Campbell had a knack of getting what she wanted.

'Actually, I'm not surprised,' I replied nonchalantly, and I really wasn't.

'True,' Jess shrugged, she just liked to have something to talk about.

James and Victoria were well known at this school for a number of reasons. Firstly, James is the signature bad boy that everyone digs thanks to Fight Club and secondly, Victoria was the feisty redhead who knew what she wanted and how to get it.

I honestly didn't give a shit. But Jess thought it was 'major'. So I went along with her little gossip session.

After an hour of passing notes, the lesson finished.

And it was time to walk the crowded hallways yet again. This time I was going to look out for Victoria and James, perhaps they were walking together now.

Then I decided I would stop trying to even care.

Because we both know I don't.

So I mulled over stupid, pointless things while I walked. I thought about my biology assignment, silently cursing the boring and empty seat next to mine.

It was the only class I sat by myself. And I did so voluntarily. Mike was nice, but he could be a pain in the arse.

Speaking of the pain...

'Bella,' he called as I walked through the doorway. I stopped myself rolling my eyes. God, even his voice irritated me. _Be nice Bella_, I scolded myself.

'Hi Mike,' I smiled at him, watching as his blonde head found its way to me. He crouched down in front of my desk, willing to make eye contact. I swiftly kept my head down. It was weird for me.

'Do you want me to sit with you today?' he would ask like every other day. He didn't quite take the hint. It was like a stupid fly that would leave you alone no matter how many times you swatted it away.

'It's okay, really Mike,' I tried to be as nice as pie. He still looked hopeful.

'Bella,' a deeper voice addressed me from behind. I swivelled in my chair and I locked eyes with Jasper Hale. His strangely golden eyes were imploring as he ruffled his messy blonde hair.

'We're partnering up today,' he started with a smile, 'do you want to partner with me?'

Jasper Hale had never spoken to me before. He was royalty like James and Victoria. Why would he speak to me?

'Umm, well okay,' I replied as he moved his bag off the seat next to him.

I left Mike dumbfounded as I went to sit with Jasper.

And sure enough, we were partnering up. I had to wonder how Jasper knew that. But before I could ask, he turned to me, making conversation.

'How much do you hate Mr. Banner's moustache?'

I did a double-take. Jasper was asking me about our biology teacher. What was the world coming to?

'Yeah, it's ugly,' I stated bemused, he seemed to notice the awkwardness between us.

'Well, tell me Bella,' he said while opening his notebook, 'what topic do you want to do. I mean I think the ethical issues of genetic engineering would be more interesting than the Krebs cycle.'

I considered that a moment. But he bought me out of my quiet musings yet again.

'Do you always bite your bottom lip like that?' he asked and I stopped immediately.

'No,' I said embarrassed, 'I don't even realise I do it.'

It was the truth.

'Well it's cute,' his lips curled into a bright smile, 'sometimes my girlfriend does it.'

I knew who he spoke of straight away.

Alice Cullen. They were inseparable at school.

'Alice?' I asked him, he nodded.

'She'd like you I think,' Jasper said, thinking.

I thought about that for a moment, I didn't think she would have a problem with anybody. It was Jasper's twin sister who would have any issues.

Rosalie Hale scared the living shit out of me.

Jasper laughed, his quiet chuckling made me turn to him.

'What?' I asked, shocked.

'Nothing,' he began while putting his arms down on the desk, leaning on them, 'you looked a little scared then.'

I waved him off. I didn't want to admit I was petrified of his beautiful, blonde sister.

We kept silent for a moment before he decided to speak.

'Do you have a car?'

I shook my head, 'I walk home.'

'Well where do you live?' his body turned to face me now.

'About ten minutes away,' I replied, letting my eyes look at his, 'on Adelaide Street.'

His eyes lit up then, 'I live on Adelaide Street too.'

'What?' I said in disbelief.

'Just on the corner of Adelaide Street and Brisbane Boulevard,' he grinned back at me. I laughed humourlessly.

Only in Seattle would something like this happen.

'So we have lived on the same street for years and didn't even know it?' I said, incredulous.

'Apparently so,' he winked, 'I can take you home now and you'll meet Alice eventually.'

I smiled, I mean really smiled for the first time today.

It was such a small world really.

The rest of the day passed in a blur. By last period I was eager to meet Jasper and Alice in the student car park. And sure enough they were there.

Alice was standing coolly beside him. They looked so good together.

'Bella,' she called when I was within ear-shot, 'I'm Alice, and it's great to meet you.'

I nodded as she bounded up to me, only reaching my shoulder in height.

'You don't have to worry,' she grinned as she pulled me into a tight hug.

I looked at her, confused. Why would I be worried?

'Rose rides with Emmett.'

I looked back at her, mouth agape, 'how-?'

'Everyone's scared of her.'

Jasper ruffled his girlfriend's hair, pulling her in to a half-hug, 'let's go ladies.'

The ride in Jasper's modified Chevrolet was fun. Alice sat in the front, her head turned towards me as we talked about everything.

'So you live with your Dad?' she asked, the wind whipping her short spiky hair about her pale face.

'Yeah, but he's always out with mates, 'I admitted, 'we don't bond.'

Alice had to laugh at that. And I joined her.

It sounded ridiculous even to my ears.

The car then slowed to a stop on a very long paved driveway.

'Well Alice, I'll see you tomorrow,' Jasper said, bending to kiss her when she swatted him away.

'I'm still talking!' she chided.

'Right...' he mumbled, sitting back as we finished our conversation.

'So you should sit with us at lunch tomorrow,' she said before leaning over and kissing Jasper.

'Okay Jazz,' she flirtatiously blinked a few times for his benefit, 'I'll see you tomorrow.'

And like that, Alice was gone.

I watched her little body bounce up the path to the most expensive looking house I had ever seen.

My jaw dropped. That was unreal.

So I hopped in the front, banging the big doors as I went. And I took another look at the beautiful wrap-around porch that was perched on the second storey. The entire house was white, and it was elegant.

Jasper started the ignition as he rolled back out of Alice's drive.

I briefly noticed a silver Volvo parked in front of us. It must be her parents' car or maybe even Emmett's.

'So about your mom,' Jasper started cautiously, he sensed it might have been a touchy subject, 'where is she now?'

I looked out the window, watching as the autumn trees flashed by quickly.

'I actually don't know,' I said after a few moments.

Jasper didn't ask me anything further after that.

Turning down our street, he parked in my driveway and turned off the ignition.

'Do you want to come in?' I asked. None of my friends had ever been inside, not even Jessica. But he had just given me a ride home, so I thought I'd better ask.

'Okay,' he undid his seatbelt, climbing out.

Once we were inside, I threw my schoolbag down onto the couch and went upstairs.

Jasper followed, admiring all the photos of my mother as he walked up the carpeted steps.

Then we were in my room, I sat on my bed and he walked straight over to my stereo.

'What kind of gold do we have here?' he asked brightly, hitting play.

The light guitar strokes of Oasis hit my ears.

'Is this Champagne Supernova?'

I nodded, loving the sound.

Jasper kept rifling through my small collection of CDs before giving up and sitting down on my bed next to me.

'Your room reminds me of Rose's,' he said quietly, still taking it all in.

It wasn't much, but it was mine.

He looked through my many photos of foreign places. Places I had never been. The Eiffel Tower, the Sydney Opera House, the Colosseum all stood in black and white.

'So were you shocked about James and Victoria?' I asked just to make conversation.

He snorted, 'not really, it won't last though.'

I didn't say anything; I couldn't blame him for saying it either. I couldn't even see it lasting.

'Oh by the way,' he turned to face me, 'James is throwing a party this weekend. You should go.'

I looked at him in disbelief. Honestly what was he thinking?

'I'll ask Alice to sort something out... You'll come with us.'

And before I could protest, Jasper was leaving.

'I can pick you up tomorrow,' he stated casually. When did people start being so nice? I just shook my head anyway, 'it's okay, honestly. I like to walk.'

Jasper rolled his eyes, 'no one likes walking. I'll see you at eight.'

Right... I was now officially riding in Jasper Hale's car. Well, why not, we did live in the same street after all.

The next day all everyone was talking about was James' big party. I wasn't even contemplating going. Why would I?

And truth to her word, Alice sat with me at lunch, opting to force herself into the company of Jess and Mike for an hour.

I wasn't quite comfortable sitting with the 'cool' kids just yet. Maybe when we graduate and leave, I might be ready.

Graduation loomed, it was less than a year away. And I still had no idea what to do with myself.

I just watched as Alice tried to make small talk with Jessica, and really failed. Jess was still reeling that someone from _that_ group was talking to _us_.

It was pathetic.

I just rolled my eyes as Alice laughed awkwardly.

So I stood up, nudging my head in the direction of the grounds outside. The cafeteria got tedious sometimes.

Alice followed. Her signature bounce was intact as we passed her usual table. Just curious glances were all we got. No doubt everyone wondering what Alice was doing hanging about with a tomboy freak.

Well, I didn't care. I liked Alice enough to ignore her stupid friends.

We found ourselves walking out through the double doors and into the cloudy light of the West Seattle School grounds.

'So, are you excited about James' party?' she asked as she giggled beside me.

'Ah, Alice,' I hesitated, 'I don't know if I'm going to go.'

Her cute face fell into a puppy pout. Oh boy, what was she doing to me?

'Why is that?' she asked still pouting.

'I haven't been to a house party. It's not really my thing,' I shrugged, my sweater moving over my skin at the movement. It tickled...

'Well, if you're scared that you won't fit in, both of my brothers will be there.'

I turned to face her, letting surprise spread over my features.

'Both of your brothers..?' I asked, not realising she had two.

She beamed up at me and her eyes were a dark topaz, 'yeah... Emmett and Edward are my brothers.'

'Does Edward go here?' I asked. I'd never heard of him before.

'Yeah,' she giggled, 'he's meant to be in biology with you and Jasper but he's been ditching the whole time.'

My eyes widened, 'how does he ditch and keep up?'

'He gets bored easily,' she played with the loose strands of her hair, 'and he already took the class last year.'

My eyes widened. I hadn't heard of this guy before. What the...

'You'll meet him on Friday night anyway,' Alice dismissed the subject and started relaying plans for my makeover. Christ.

***

Friday night my hair was done, all wavy and shiny.

My clothes went from tomboy to decent. Alice had put me in a pair of jeans and a nice red sweater.

It was still a little tomboyish, but I looked nice. She had placed minimal makeup on my face, just some powder and mascara before swivelling me around on the chair in my room.

I looked like me, just more refined. I liked it.

'Thanks Alice,' I said while I admired my new hair.

'Sure thing,' she beamed down at me, 'now let's get going.'

I watched her as she strode out the room. Her tight jeans were accompanied by an expensive looking sweater under a hip-length, stylish black jacket.

She stood in the doorway then, turning around to face me as she pulled on her black beret. She looked very cute.

'Ready?' she asked as I nodded and followed her out the door.

Her car was a yellow Porsche. Of course it would be.

'Jesus Christ Alice,' I let out a long whistle as I hopped in the front seat.

'It was my birthday present last year, 'she patted the dashboard, 'and Edward picked it out.' I just shook my head. That was amazing.

'So what's this party going to be like?' I asked, raising my eyebrow at her.

'Boring for the most-part,' she admitted, 'it's all about making an appearance.'

I cringed, 'great.'

'Don't worry Bella, I'll introduce you to my brothers and you'll be fine.'

I sincerely doubted it.

And there we were, stepping out of Alice's Porsche onto a cobbled stone drive that held dozens of other cars. There just a few spaces down, sat that silver Volvo.

'Ah, not that rapper shit again,' Alice whined. And sure enough, as we reached the house, all that could be heard were head-banging rap beats.

'Is this what it's always like?' I asked, incredulous.

'Yep, 'she sighed, grabbing my hand and pulling me along with her, 'and you're not backing out now.'

'Sheesh,' I started, 'don't be so eager.'

'Just watch me, Bella.' Then she laughed, letting go of my hand as we made our way in through the front door.

The house was beautiful. Probably nicer than even Alice's, but I didn't focus on such things. Instead I followed Alice through the crowd until we both spotted Jasper sitting casually with James and Emmett.

'Jazz,' Alice rushed up to his side, kissing his cheek, 'I've missed you.'

'I've missed you too,' he snuggled his face into her neck, kissing her.

It was awkward for me, so I looked away. That was until Emmett addressed me.

'So Bella,' he began in his deep voice, 'what do you think about West Seattle High?'

I looked at him, confused, 'it's great.'

'So what school did you come from?' he asked genuinely. I couldn't help but laugh at him and how serious he was.

'I've only ever gone to West Seattle High.'

He looked dumbfounded at first, but enlightenment crossed his features as he realised what I meant. I just rolled my eyes. Boys...

'Hey Em,' Alice called from her position on Jasper's lap, 'where's Edward?'

Emmett shrugged, 'he's probably outside somewhere.'

'Seriously man,' I heard Jasper start to say to James, 'this music is fucking awful.'

James just shrugged, his dirty blonde hair falling limply over the leather of his jacket.

'Vic likes it.'

Everybody sat awkwardly in the silence as the song changed.

'I can hook my iPod up,' I said and Jasper grinned brightly.

'Yeah, okay,' James hopped up, deciding to show me to the stereo.

He showed me to the massive setup he had. I couldn't help but be entranced as he casually strode through huddled groups of people.

He strutted more than strode. It was like he had a purpose, with everything. Even just to get a hold of new music.

He stopped abruptly, so suddenly that I accidently hit into the back of him.

'Well,' he smirked as I straightened myself out. I was always awkward and clumsy. It was just my nature.

'I'm sorry,' I mumbled, too embarrassed to look him in the eye.

'That's alright,' James smoothly placed his rough hand on my hip. He kept it there while I stood gaping at it.

He must have got the hint that I was uncomfortable, so he dropped it.

I just pulled out my silver iPod and held it out to him.

'Just hit the play button,' I said quietly as he took it.

The next moment the music changed, the rhythmic beating of drums from The Panics began to play.

'I like it,' he turned back to me with a glint in his eye.

'I love a girl with good taste in music.'

I cocked an eyebrow, wondering why he was looking at me that way while he was with another girl.

'I mean, I like brunettes with a good taste in music,' he was clearly trying his luck as he started twirling a piece of my hair between his calloused fingers.

I just looked at him, disgust written all over my face, 'you're with Victoria.'

'Who _are_ you talking about?' he asked, mock innocence colouring his tone.

Then he smiled wryly before gripping my hip like he had before.

'Your girlfriend,' I said awkwardly. I just couldn't build up enough courage to tell him where to go.

'_What_ girlfriend,' he asked slyly, smirking yet again.

I huffed loudly.

I'd had enough by the time he leant down to rub his god-awful lips against mine.

Without a word, I pushed him off me and went straight for the door. I wasn't hanging around here with that arsehole.

The closest door was to a balcony outside, I didn't even think before I strode outside and went straight for the railings. I stopped short, just holding my hands on the cool metal as I let the cold night air tickle my face.

Then I heard him.

It was just a slight noise from behind me. I could smell the cigarette smoke from where I stood.

I turned around as he held the cigarette to his lips, drawing in the mixture of tobacco and nicotine. He didn't look at me as I stood gaping at him like a fool. Well I couldn't help it anyway.

He had this rugged look about him as he stood leaning against the wall on the opposite side of the balcony. It was like no one cared for him but he didn't mind nonetheless.

I watched him as he let out a gust of air, letting the cigarette smoke swirl around his pale face and handsome bronze hair.

His black leather jacket was just slightly open.

The collar was flipped up, grazing the side of his tight, square jaw.

He was a sight to see, even as he focused his hard green eyes on mine. It was as though I had invaded his personal space by being here, on his balcony.

And then James stumbled through the same door I had, he found me and made his way over.

It was as though he hadn't even seen the person standing before me.

I let my eyes stray from the perfect planes of the stranger's face, only to assess the threat James offered.

The latter stood before me, eyes hungry as though he'd been looking for me.

'Where have you been Bella?' he asked with a sneer, approaching me.

I briefly thought about kneeing him in the groin as he kept getting closer, his slimy way of walking served as a signal to just _do it_.

But as he got close enough to touch me, the stranger spoke.

'Fuck off James,' he said only loud enough for us to hear. His voice was deep, hoarse from the cigarette smoke.

'Wha-'James began before the stranger cut him off.

'She clearly isn't interested,' he said in between casual draws of his cigarette.

James huffed as he kept pushing it, coming close enough to breathe down my neck. I could feel his hot breath itch at my skin. My breathing quickened, approaching hyperventilation.

'Victoria's just inside,' the man spoke again, and she really was at the glass door. But she wasn't looking, even as I backed away, right up against the railing.

'Fuck,' James swore, exasperated.

But he left me alone, walking quickly through the door, shutting it loudly.

I let my breath slow down to its normal speed.

I felt myself come away from the railing as I locked eyes with the man while he stood, putting out his cigarette.

'Thanks,' I said quietly, gathering my thoughts.

He shrugged, running his right hand through his thick hair.

'What's this song called?' he asked genuinely interested. I listened for a moment and then rolled my eyes.

'It's Oasis,' I said as I crossed my arms. What a perfect song to be playing. Then I thought about getting my iPod back from James. Would I ever see it again?

'Champagne Supernova,' he stated more than asked.

I was a little shocked.

And he didn't seem to notice.

'What's your name?' he said, jolting me out of my reverie.

I blinked gracelessly. Yes I had briefly forgotten everything.

'Uh, Bella Swan,' I finished lamely. He smirked at me, extending a hand.

'I'm Edward Cullen.'


	2. Talk Show Host

**Chapter 2: Talk Show Host **

**This Is through Edward's eyes. Just letting you know x**

**Oh and sorry about the lack of disclaimer in the previous chapter.**

**We are definately not Steph.**

Fuck.

Another night wasting away on a pathetic party.

I don't know why I continue to be forced into coming here with Alice, Emmett and their useless friends. Do I constantly need to be reminded of them sucking each other's faces off? No thanks.

Truthfully, I prefer to be at home in the comfort of my bedroom - _my sanctuary_, with my iPod full blast with headphones slowly stealing my hearing away from me. At least they'd be doing their best to block out any unnecessary thoughts seeping their way to my brain.

I would probably have Radiohead playing.

I prefer to be unsociable.

You know, listening to music alone was more appealing than having a social life.

Even reading books about other people's social lives had more appeal.

I like to be just left alone.

But, I'm not in my quiet bedroom.

I'm here. Here at this fucking party. James' party...

I shudder at the thought.

And to top it all off I'm freezing my balls standing here on this fucking balcony.

Seattle weather is so predictable.

Dark. Gloomy. Depressing. And on the verge of rain drops.

Who honestly wants to live where it rains nine months of the year? It's only nice when you've got someone to share it with. I shake my head before the unnecessary thoughts come rushing back to me - again.

I've lived here all my life and even now, as the ice cold wind hits my cheeks, it still sends shivers travelling down my neck, into to the already cold heart in my chest.

The smoke I'm inhaling from my cigarette is my only provider of warmth.

But it's peaceful on the balcony, no interruptions.

And someone was finally smart enough to change the shit rap music that was playing earlier to some light acoustic sounds.

Well, it _was_ peaceful. Until someone came bolting through the doors to invade my space.

When it had happened, I just couldn't bring myself to turn and look at who it could be. I don't know why, but I found myself immediately pissed off at whoever they were, just for thinking I was going to share the balcony.

It had taken quite some time to realize that everyone was too busy to bother to come up here, which was why I had seized the opportunity to use it as my get away.

A strong gust of wind startled me, sending another round of fucking shivers through my body. I shuddered as they ended once again, in my dead chest.

And then I could smell her. It was a distinct smell of orange blossom.

_Stop thinking of what she smells like. _

_Who gives a shit anyway? This is my balcony._  
But I couldn't resist anymore, I finally turned around to sneak a glance at this mystery girl.

What a mistake.

She was staring at me, her eyes piercing through mine.

So I did nothing but stare back - probably with more angst then needed. But after all, she was invading my privacy.

Before I really let myself see her, someone else was coming through the doors.

James. Of course, I should have known.

And he was making his way towards the mystery girl, obviously not noticing I was there watching his every move.

'Where have you been Bella?' he asked with a sneer, leaning in closer towards her.

So her name was Bella was it? What a sweet name.  
_No, I don't care what her fucking name is. _

I had to say something, before he came any closer. It was obvious she was uncomfortable and didn't want to be within that proximity of him.

Just before he was at the ready to touch her, I spoke - only loud enough for us to hear.

There was no need to start a commotion.

'Fuck off James.'

He tried to talk back to me but I didn't give the words enough time to escape his mouth.

'She clearly isn't interested.'

He still wouldn't move. He actually had the nerve to come closer to her. I had to steer him away.

I then noticed Victoria standing with her back towards the glass door. Hopefully if I mentioned her it would be enough for him to leave.

'Victoria's just inside.'

I was right. It did the trick.

'Fuck', he sighed, knowing he had failed.

He quickly walked away with a loud thud as he slammed the door.

Moron.

I noticed the girl - _sorry Bella it was_, slowly become more relaxed as her breathing paced to its normal speed. She watched me intently as I put out the remains of my cigarette.

She looked nervous as she stood with her beautiful chocolate waves falling loosely over her chest.

'Thanks,' she said in a voice so quiet, it was barely a whisper.  
I just shrugged and ran my hands through my hair - it was a bad habit.

'What's this song called?' I asked before the silence became awkward, even though I already knew the answer.

Before she replied, telling me it was Oasis, she had rolled her deep brown eyes at my comment.

'Champagne Supernova,' I added simply to prove I was well aware of the music playing.

I suddenly felt a strange desire to please her.

_Get over it Edward._

'What's your name?' I asked, ignoring the boisterous clutter in my head.  
It took her a few seconds before she managed to stutter it out.

'Uh, Bella Swan.' I couldn't help but smirk as I extended my hand to her and introduced myself.

'I'm Edward Cullen.'

Moments passed by and we were just staring at each other. But it wasn't creepy or anything. It felt natural as we just stood there as if we were silently trying to figure each other out.

Well at least that's what I was doing._ And where did this girl come from?_

Now I realise I still have a bottle of Jack Daniel's in my pocket; I can offer her a drink. It doesn't look like she's in a rush to get back to the party. She doesn't seem like everyone else.

I wonder why I haven't seen her before. Then again, West Seattle High is overly massive. I don't think I even know everyone in my year, let alone the whole school.

And suddenly my head is spinning. _Jack Daniel's was a mind fuck._  
My mouth is achingly dry, I need water. We must have been talking for hours, but I can't seem to remember any conversation clearly, only scattered words.

And Bella is peacefully asleep on my shoulder. And I have no idea why.  
_Man, I didn't even know this Bella chick. I still didn't understand why I practically asked her to get drunk with me.  
Seriously, what the fuck?  
I should hated hate her. _

She is kind of sweet though, I can admit. There's something about her that has me captivated. It's as if every breath she takes is intriguing.

Even in her quiet slumber.

I want to know what she's thinking. She seems so quiet, talking in whispers only. But her mind seems like it's always conjuring up thoughts. I want to know her secrets.  
And I need to stop thinking about her._  
Mmm, my shoulder was a constant reminder of the scent she left behind. Orange Blossom.  
No.  
Fuck._

_What could we have possibly talked about?_ Why can't I remember? This is strangely killing me. She didn't drink nearly as much as me, but it affected her almost instantly. She had let her guard down after only one sip.

I probably let mine down too, tends to be a habit while being intoxicated. She wasn't the tense girl that I stumbled across on the balcony when she was drunk. And she isn't that same girl anymore now as I sit here with her soft tresses falling limply over my shoulder. She had become carefree, talkative - yet still shy, and quietly spoken. She's a mystery just waiting for me to work out.  
_She was like the fucking DaVinci Code._

Fuck, what is it going to be like at school?  
Whatever - I mean nothing has happened anyway, right?

After everything I've been through, I shouldn't be feeling like this. She is just a girl. A fucked up girl at the least. A fucked up girl who is invading my privacy tonight. A fucked up girl who could seriously fuck up a guy like me – _who was already fucked up, royally._

***

It's already Monday.

For Fuck's sake.

Can't school just piss off?

As if my weekend wasn't bad enough, now I have to sit here with the plague before my eyes?

Admittedly, she's quite a beautiful plague.

A beautiful demon coming to ruin everything I have and everything I stand for.

Well, why did I bother coming to bio again?

Oh, that's right.

My pathetic, jovial side needs to see her face again.

I wish I could just stop thinking about her.

I mean, what kind of guy could deserve someone like her?

Definitely not me.

Edward Cullen with his obscene smoking habits, constant self-loathing and inconstant moods.

Well, I was generally decent enough to stay away from other girls.

I can be good when I try.

But there is something about the way this Bella Swan sits straight in her chair, or the way she casually flicks her long hair out behind her.

As if it's getting in the way.

Or perhaps it's her unconscious way of sending her glorious scent wafting my way.

_Either way, I couldn't have her._

So I am just going to do my darnest to not get hurt.

It means I'll have to pull out the big guns.

And she decides to turn around and look at me, right during my decision-making musings.

Fuck.

_Okay, Edward, you needed to pull a threatening face._

But I can't stop looking, her eyes are inquiring mine.

It seems as though she is asking me something.

I can't quite make out what though.

I can't help but smile as she refuses to look away.

And in this one instant, her face turns sour.

There you go Edward.

She hates you.

I suppose that's all I need.

I'll stop fucking thinking about her now.

I'll make sure I do.

Even as I sit here, at my piano and willing my thoughts to stop, Bella dances before me.

I try so hard to write anything else, but all that keeps developing in my fucking head is that stupid song.

The one that embodies her in every way.

Perhaps I should call it Bella's Lullaby.

Just stop Edward. I mean what kind of loser sits here all love sick. Fucking unrequited love I tell you.

What a perfect time to hit play on Radiohead.

Let's let them mock me.

Motherfucking Talk Show Host.

So I grasp at my guitar, it's all acoustic and shit.

And now I strum my fingers over the strings like I would caress Bella's body.

Play the chords first Edward.

Now add in the riff.

There we go.

I don't even need to sing the lyrics.

They echo in my head. Like a plague. Like Bella.

_I want to be someone else or I'll explode._

My fingers pluck the three main strings consecutively.

_Floating upon the surface for the birds._

I let out a gust of air, cold and hard.

_You want me? Fucking well come and find me... I'll be waiting._

The last note lingers in the space around my head, swirling like a whirlpool in the depths of the ocean.

_Come on and break the door down. I'm ready._

Why would she want someone like me anyway?

Someone with more problems than the royal family.

Yeah, I wasn't joking when I said I was royally fucked up.

But it can't hurt too much to think about her.

Really, at least if I need to write something. I need to write it. I have to get it out there. That's why it's bugging me. So just fucking do it already!

The keys of the piano stand for Bella and I as I lean over the piano. Black and White. Complete fucking opposites.

Whatever. And I sigh like a bitch.


	3. Best of You

**Chapter Three: Best of You**

**And this is a Bella chapter yes!**

**oh and we aren't steph and yeah thats pretty much it xx**

I turned off my blaring alarm clock.

Sadly, I had forgotten to turn it off for the weekend.

So it was a Saturday morning and I was up at seven.

I was having some trouble recollecting the events of the night before as I trudged down the staircase.

What had happened?

And boy did I have a headache.

As I walked into the little kitchen, I saw the note Charlie left. He was out fishing again with friends, but I honestly didn't care what he did.

I needed painkillers.

And some water.

So I popped a few tablets, downed some water and decided to just pass my time reading.

But as much as I tried, I couldn't concentrate on the way Mr. Darcy looked at Elizabeth.

Instead I caught myself randomly thinking of the copper coloured rust of the kitchen pipes, or the overly green grass outside.

The images were frustrating me.

And when I looked into the sky, the strange pearly white clouds startled me.

Even the black leather of the lounge had me double-taking.

What was going on with me?

Why was I thinking of black leather, copper, mossy green and pearly white?

Oh shit.

Edward Cullen.

The only thing I couldn't recall was his smell.

But I had this almost ruthless feeling that he had the best fragrance I had ever smelled.

Well too bad now.

I wouldn't remember, nor was there a chance to be reminded.

The awkwardness of waking up sober in his limp arms was not something I wanted to experience again.

Yeah his body felt great next to mine, but something felt wrong and out of place.

It felt uncomfortable to lay my head on his chest. Like your first kiss you know.

You wonder how weird it must be for the other person.

Well he would have been dead to the world anyway.

We had both passed out cold from the excessive amount of alcohol consumed.

Who cares if he felt awkward?

Ok, fine.

I do, but I've learnt to ignore my inner thoughts.

This was how my day progressed.

I mulled over the situation I had put myself in by drinking.

I tried in vain to remember the events as they unfolded.

Sadly, nothing worked.

Every time I tried to recall something he would have said, all I see his face in my memory.

All I could place was how the Jack Daniel's had let his guard down.

Instead of the stern, cold and fierce anti-hero in the leather jacket, Edward had become the tormented, lonely and humbled teenager who was too afraid to let anyone else in.

He was a rebel without a cause.

And I mentally slapped myself for thinking about him again.

God, I had become one of _those_ girls.

So I tried to push him out of my thoughts.

Yet even as I stood at the sink, washing the dishes, I swear I could feel his eyes boring into the back of my head.

I felt like I couldn't think anything in case he might overhear.

_Yeah, _I snorted in my head_, like he could read my thoughts anyway._

So I actually slapped myself as his face swam in and out of my focus.

It was pathetic.

It wasn't like me.

So every time the image of his handsome face flooded my memory, I would beat it back with a very large and scary, yet imaginative baseball bat.

I even had to chant to myself while on the phone to Alice.

_I'm not a stupid, giddy little girl with a crush. _

It was particularly hard when she had mentioned her brother.

I tried hard to forget about him, but it was to no avail.

So I forced my thoughts away from those bright green eyes.

Well that worked until Monday morning.

Second period was Biology.

My eyes popped out of my head when I saw him beside Jasper.

He was sitting, carefully leaning back in the chair with his legs stretched out from under the table.

He didn't register me walking in.

I tried to ignore him as I headed toward the table in front of his.

Amazingly it had worked, my eyes only got to see his hypnotising face from my peripherals.

Thank God.

But, as I sat with my back to his, I inhaled what resembled cigarette smoke, some sort of Moroccan spice and black pepper.

The addictive scent of his cologne combined with the cigarette smoke had brought image upon image into my already overcrowded memory.

I felt the heat rushing to my face as I remembered leaning in on his chest, holding his bottle of Jack Daniel's between my legs as we sat.

I was slurring pretty badly too.

Yet so was he, but it didn't stop him from talking animatedly about many things I couldn't quite remember now.

Then as my eyes began to close and my slurring had turned into sleepy murmurs, he had started to hum a familiar melody.

We were both leaning back on the railings of the balcony, completely unaware and yet all too content to be sitting there in the cold.

That was the memory I was trying to remember.

I couldn't think of the tune, in fact I was sure I hadn't ever heard it.

It was a lot like Coldplay, but perhaps even better.

As Edward shifted in his seat behind me, a fresh wave of his scent was hurtled my way.

My breathing hitched as I suddenly remember the feel of his soft hand as it found one of mine.

He must have thought I was asleep.

Or he was really drunk and didn't care that he was actually touching me.

He had begun to softly caress my palm with his thumb as we lay drunk on the freezing balcony.

I know now that my body didn't respond to either to him, nor the cold.

I was gone.

Yet as I felt asleep, I distinctly remember the feel of something warm touching my temple.

Was it his lips?

I couldn't help it. I unconsciously turned around in my seat and looked at him.

So I made the most of my awkward mistake and found his eyes.

He was looking at me already.

I cursed silently, letting my conscious attack my subconscious for its stupid mistake.

Feeling an uncomfortable wrenching in my lower stomach, I couldn't rip my eyes away from his.

So I just stared lamely at his handsome face.

It was incredibly embarrassing.

But I felt even worse when a slight smirk began to dance around his dark red lips.

What was I doing?

Stop looking at him!

But I couldn't. I couldn't even try to look angry to cover up my blatant stare.

Think about something else, for Christ's sake.

So I thought about Charlie naked.

That did the trick.

My face twisted in disgust as I was finally able to turn away from him.

And I didn't even hear a snort, sense a smirk or anything from behind me.

That was good.

Yet as I turned my head back towards the front of the room, I heard Jasper start to talk. He was deliberately loud enough for me to hear.

'Man, I have never seen you in Bio,' he chuckled from behind me, 'what's going on?'

Jasper's tone was incredulous, and I knew it to be exaggerated.

Still, I couldn't wait for Edward's answer.

But his voice was so low I couldn't hear his deep voice even from where I was.

Thank God for Jasper.

'So you're behind are you?' he said more loudly than necessary.

I just smirked from my seat in front.

He was supposed to have taken this class already.

Jasper only got deep murmurs in reply. Luckily, Jasper kept up the act. Whether or not it was for me, we'll never know.

'So you're not falling behind? You wha-,' Jasper was cut off by the same hurried whispers.

'You want me to be quiet,' Jasper raised his voice purposefully.

'Fucking shut up, Jasper,' Edward had snapped loudly.

He didn't talk for another ten minutes after that.

Determined to get a conversation going, Jasper called my name softly so Banner couldn't hear.

'Hey Bella,' he had whispered from behind me.

I turned around cautiously. I didn't want to look at Edward.

And I failed miserably.

Luckily he was avoiding my gaze anyway.

'How was your weekend?' Jasper smiled as he asked.

I shrugged, hoping to seem as calm as possible.

'Yeah, I just hung about the house for a while and spoke to Alice on the phone yesterday.' Let's see if they could get anything out of that.

Why was I worrying about it anyway?

God knows.

I let Jasper continue the chat.

'Yeah, the party was alright, don't you think?'

Great. The perfect topic.

I thought I should just be as innocent as possible.

'Yeah, I don't really remember much.' God what a lie.

My heart skipped a beat as Edward was suddenly interested in the conversation.

His eyes found mine as I spoke to Jasper. He didn't look angry, or upset. He looked interested. That was when he decided to speak.

'You only had two shots of Jack Daniel's over the five hours we were there,' he cut Jasper off, completely oblivious to his friend's gaping jaw.

'Uh,' I started whilst secretly cursing the handsome face before me, 'I don't drink much. I get intoxicated very easily.'

I heard him snort as I turned my face to see Jasper chuckling quietly next to Edward.

He didn't say a word, even when Edward began blurting things out.

'Well, truth be told you did sleep most of the time.'

I let my jaw drop.

I wished he would shut up.

He made me look like a sneaky little kid pinching her father's beer and falling asleep after only half of it.

Well, Jasper had found something else completely funny.

'You guys seemed to have made quite an impression on each other.'

Edward turned away, a calm expression on his pale face.

'Not really,' he kept his eyes away from mine, 'she was asleep anyway.'

I grimaced. I wanted him to just piss off.

What a jerk.

'Yeah, Edward bored me to death,' I said, letting him have it.

Jasper actually threw his head back as he laughed. Banner shushed him, yet he took no notice.

Edward seemed to be playing the same game that I was.

'Well, I don't bother impressing people who aren't worth it.'

I just snorted, amazed.

Was he for real?

Oh, but he was.

'Right, so I'm supposed to care whether you find me interesting or not?'

And he didn't have anything to say back.

He just leant lazily back in his chair, holding his hands on his head as he smirked at me.

What a prick.

But he had held my attention.

I think that was all he wanted.

And the prick got it.

So I turned around, feigning indifference.

But it was so much more than that. This frustrating... distraction was not going to get to me.

I simply wouldn't let it.

Yet even as I sat still, pretending to write notes, I had to fight the urge to turn around and look at him. Those brilliant emerald eyes were marvellous against his stark white skin.

But turning around and looking would be giving in to his taunting.

And why would I let him have the satisfaction?

That's right, I wasn't going to.

On the way out of biology, Jasper caught up to me.

'So, I'll meet you in the car park after school?' he asked flashing a wide grin.

I shrugged, 'yeah, sure.'

Jasper's grin turned into a smirk.

'We're all going to Alice's this afternoon, and you've already agreed.'

I shook my head. Honestly, I could just walk home.

But he beat me to it.

'Don't even think about 'just walking',' he commanded in a sarcastic tone, 'I mean seriously Bella, you should hang out with Alice more, she likes you a lot.'

I rolled my eyes, but agreed nonetheless.

'Yeah yeah... whatever I guess.'

Jasper playfully pushed my shoulder as he walked off towards his next class.

And then I just trudged my way through the hall until I reached English.

Well at least Edward wasn't in my English class. I could have my peace here.

I really needed to stop thinking about him.

I'm supposed to hate him anyway.

_Because... I wasn't interesting enough, _well to him anyway_._

What a prick.

_Stop thinking about him!_

Yet thinking about him was all I did do until Lunch. It didn't even stop then.

Even as he was nowhere in sight, I thought about what he would be doing if he sat with us. Would he eat? And if he did, what would he eat?

Would he talk with us? Or maybe read a book?

I really needed to just stop thinking about him.

But I couldn't, he was like a drug.

Even as I tried to force him out of my mind, the jerk would creep back into my innocent thoughts and turn them sour.

The most random thing like shiny metal would remind me of him.

The shiny metal would remind me of cutlery, or particularly the spoon I had used this morning. The spoon I had thought about had actually stirred my morning coffee.

That coffee I had at seven o'clock smelled like Edward.

The Moroccan spice.

It was cinnamon and coffee beans.

He was a heavenly mix of honey, cinnamon and coffee.

And you couldn't forget the tobacco.

Somehow the different scents would mingle and form the exact image of Edward in my head.

Perhaps I was just going insane.

I did end up meeting Jasper after school.

He had Alice's hand in his.

I couldn't help but grin at my new friends as they comfortably and publicly displayed copious amount of affection for each other.

Edward wasn't there.

He must have driven his own car.

So I ripped the thought from my head and returned Alice's vice-like hug.

'It's been ages!' she almost yelled at me.

I couldn't help but smile, even though it had been only a couple of hours.

'Yes, I can't live without you either, Alice,' I tried to grin widely, but it came across as an awful grimace.

Alice just laughed.

'You aren't one for hugs or love, are you?'

I shook my head.

'Charlie wouldn't know a hug if it slapped him in the face.'

Alice looked at me sympathetically.

I just rolled my eyes.

It was only natural for me.

The whole icky lovey bullshit was not me. Period.

I was more the silently appreciative type.

I preferred my space.

It was probably why the prospect of having a boyfriend had never appealed to me.

Yuck, why would I want some guy touching me?

No thank-you.

But even as I ranted in my head, having Alice look on confused from the many strange faces I would pull, I let my mind drift to the visible bronze coloured rust above the tyres of Jasper's car.

What the hell was I doing?

No, don't even go there.

I was so pathetic.

I even had to tell myself off – in my own head.

So I just huffed loudly, letting Alice know I was over my inwardly directed rant before opening the back door and shoving in.

She shrugged, deciding not to ask anymore. I think she knew she couldn't handle the odd workings of my mind.

Hell, even I couldn't.

And then we were at Alice's.

It was exactly the same as it had been a few days ago.

Right down to the impossibly shiny silver Volvo out the front yet again.

I admired the large arc of the oaken front door.

It was beautiful.

The brass knocker was polished, just as everything else around it seemed to be. The knocker matched the brass door knob and solid metal frame around the doorway.

Everything was themed precisely.

I loved it.

Alice and Jasper pushed me through the door after a long moment of me admiring the shiny knob.

Yes, I liked door knobs.

But inside was even better.

It was the kind of place you would see in a home and lifestyle magazine.

I mean seriously, how much money can one family have?

Alice saw my face and giggled.

'We're home.'

I just nodded, my jaw slowly falling open without me realizing.

The high ceilings were almost gothic with large arches over our heads.

The stark white walls contrasted perfectly with the dark wood of the furniture and the deep red of the longue cushions.

The colour schemes were amazing.

Who had the time and the money to live so lavishly?

Alice, Edward and Emmett of course...

And speaking of Alice, she grabbed my hand and began talking at a speed I couldn't keep up with. I did manage to gather fragments.

'...this is the kitchen. It's just been renovated...'

It did look new, the dark granite of the bench tops were spotless.

'...over this way Bella...' she had herded me towards a doorway where the plush chocolate carpet met polished timber floorboards. Amazing...

'...the staircase here leads up to our bedrooms...'

I looked up at the timber flooring of the staircase. It was straight and flat against the further wall, but it had an odd charm to it.

I was reminded idly of the Nanny Fran and Mr. Sheffield's house on television.

But this was Seattle suburbia, not show business.

Alice hadn't released her grip at all, even as she pulled me up the staircase.

We had both left Jasper behind in the kitchen.

'...do you want to see my room first?' she had asked with wide, puppy dog eyes.

I smiled and nodded, happy to be herded around the beautiful home.

Why couldn't I live here?

Alice's room was gorgeous.

There was a king size four-poster bed towards the back wall. Alice had Sunflower yellow sheets under a yellow satin quilt.

The pillows were full and soft-looking. So much so I really felt the need to jump in amongst them all.

But I refrained.

For now anyway.

So I walked around and casually picked up photo frames, ran my hands over scented candles or carefully admired ornaments.

Alice had so many.

Especially photos.

I saw a handful of Rosalie and Alice together, more of Jasper and a few of what I assumed to be Mr and Mrs Cullen and Emmett.

There was exactly three of Edward.

And Alice had gone.

It was probably to get Jasper from the kitchen where he would no doubt have been feeding his face.

So I kept wandering around the room, loving how the matching curtains framed the wooden panels of the wide windows.

And very conveniently, the windows opened up to a very climbable tree outside.

But just as I had begun to make my way over to the windows to look outside, I heard a piano start playing from down the hall.

So I stopped dead in my tracks as the music moulded into something I knew.

It was so familiar, and yet I couldn't quite place where I knew it from.

I turned around and made my way back out the door and down the hallway.

I followed the sound of the lingering notes.

And then suddenly, the echo of the last note abruptly stopped. Someone had pulled their foot off the pedal underneath.

Then as I inched closer to the sound, the music began again.

Odd.

As I took each step closer, the light from the last doorway in the corridor was filtering through and illuminating a path for me to walk.

There was a slightly ajar door.

The music kept playing.

And I needed to know who it was. Because it was eating me up that I couldn't remember what the tune was.

Just as it had happened before, the music stopped dead in its tracks.

So I inched closer to the barely open door.

I dared a glance inside the room, expecting a professional in a suit.

But there upon the black grand piano sat Edward in his straight leather jacket and black jeans that he had worn to school today.

He was bent over the keys, writing in pencil upon a blank page of sheet music.

His arm was held carefully above the white and black of the piano as he wrote in quavers, rests and many treble clefs.

I could only just make them out as he placed the pencil next to the sheet he wrote on and began to play again.

He was writing his own music.

Edward played and wrote for the piano.

No way.

I couldn't help myself.

I had to be in there while he played.

So I opened the door as quietly as I could and let myself in.

He had his back to me, his broad shoulders hunched as he played.

So he had no idea I was there.

I stood carefully against the wall, sure to make the least amount of noise as possible while I watched him let loose on the most beautiful instrument I had ever seen.

Edward let his fingers press each note softly as his left hand organised the chords and the right played the sweetest melody I had ever heard.

And yes, I had heard it before.

But where, I couldn't remember for sure.

But I was too mesmerised to worry about it.

It was like I was watching him in his natural element.

It seemed very surreal.

Yet as he changed the melody to an octave below the original, I suddenly realised where I knew the tune from.

He had hummed to me the very melody I was listening to him play.

And yet he was only writing it now.

I watched him still as he had stopped again to write yet another bar down. The funny little pictures seemed like another language to me.

I then wondered where we were. Was this his room?

There was a bed the same size as Alice's.

It was in the corner on the far side of the room, draped in darker satin sheets and not so many pillows.

The room was also teeming with racks of CDs, books and movies.

So this was what Edward was doing while he ditched bio.

I rolled my eyes, letting them fall on a picture of the Foo Fighters.

He had their latest album.

No way, I did not picture him a Foos fan.

Maybe Alice had bought it for him, and he didn't actually like them.

It was just that Edward seemed more like an I-hate-the-world-and-love-to-hear-My-Chemical-Romance-sing-about-it kind of guy.

The Foos seemed more like an Emmett band.

So I inched closer to Edward and his many CDs, knowing full well that he would be able to see me.

And he did.

His playing immediately stopped, with a very loud thud of the keys as he must have let his hands fall down in shock.

'What are you doing in here?' he asked, his voice laced with both anger and embarrassment.

I just shrugged, still not looking at him.

'I could hear you from Alice's room.'

I heard him huff too dramatically.

'So you just barge in here?'

I let myself look at him.

He was on the chair still, but his whole body was turned to face me as he sat there glaring.

'Why not?' I then asked innocently.

He just let out a frustrated growl.

'Because this is my room.'

I actually snorted at him, 'so what?'

He held his hair in his hands as he probably began thinking of the many ways to get me out of the room.

'I mean, your room looks more like a businessman's office than a bedroom,' I tried to rile him up.

He just cocked an eyebrow at me, his lips pursed in annoyance.

I turned to him after pretending to inspect his music.

'Well at least you have some decent music,' I laughed as I picked up a few different cases. He squirmed.

'Be careful, they're all in alphabetical order.'

I didn't hide my incredulous face.

'What?'

He just repeated himself as though I actually had a hearing problem and didn't understand.

I just rolled my eyes, albeit a little too dramatically.

Then I decided to do something completely out of character – I purposefully went through and mixed up his perfect order.

Edward just sat there with wide eyes, watching as I ruined his music collection's alphabetical numbering.

'Seriously, I thought you were cool,' I said, letting him make what he would out of that.

He began sulking, walking over and beginning to fix the mess I had started to make. I didn't let him.

I pinched the stack of CDs he had in his hand and took off across the room.

Since when do boys keep things neat and tidy?

Not normal ones anyway.

I was determined that Edward was not going to be one of those queer maniacs who have obsessive compulsive disorder at only eighteen.

He followed me like I had expected.

And he tackled me like I didn't expect.

It's odd how things can change from just one touch.

He must have felt it too.

As soon as his warm arms enveloped mine, an awkward stomach heaving and gut wrenching feeling erupted in my lower abdomen.

I stopped short.

And so did Edward.

I was completely stunned.

_What the hell was that?_

He immediately let go, walked over to his piano and sat back down.

The atmosphere was tense, and all I wanted to do was alleviate that tension. So I picked a CD from the bundle I carried and handed it to him.

At least a conversation about decent music wouldn't leave things weird and awkward.

I just followed him to where he sat, picking out the CD I wanted to play and handing it too him.

He saw the front cover and smiled brightly.

'I never really liked the Foo Fighters, but there is one song I love on this album,' he had said as he took the case from me.

Then he turned around and let his fingers trace the many keys on the piano.

He started playing Best of You as though he had read my mind.

I sat down by him on the piano stool and watched as he performed the song with his handsome hands.

I could imagine the lyrics spilling out of Dave Grohl's mouth as Edward played the melody in two octaves of harmony.

I could make out when the chorus started.

_Is someone getting the best..._

Edward had looked over to my enthralled face as I watched him play.

_The best._

His eyes had locked with mine while he didn't even bother to watch where his fingers fell.

_The best._

A shy smile had danced around his incredible blood-red lips as he focussed his eyes on mine.

_The best of you?_

And in that one frame of time, the air was no longer tense.

But warm and inviting, like a hot summer's day.

**okay. i'm going to grovel. Please review. it makes us feel loved**


	4. Everything You Want

**Chapter Four: Everything You Want**

**Sorry about any typos!!!**

**And again - not stephanie meyer.**

**Enjoy please!!**

The door pushed open from behind us.

Alice stood in the doorway, smiling widely.

We both had turned around and stood watching her as she came closer.

I felt Edward tense up beside me as she began to speak.

'There you are, Bella.'

I just kept quiet, carefully avoiding Edward's gaze.

'We're about to put on a movie,' she turned to look at her brother, an exchange occurred, 'do you want to watch it with us?'

I let myself look at Edward.

I shouldn't have.

He looked infuriated.

It scared the hell out of me.

Alice didn't exactly note his recent change in mood.

'Do you mind if we steal her Edward?'

He didn't even look at me when he roughly spoke.

'I don't care, she was just leaving anyway.'

What the hell?

I was so confused.

And I was hurt.

So I let out the gust of air I was holding and shoved off the piano seat.

I then spoke loud enough for Edward to hear the tone of my voice.

'I think I might just go home,' I felt annoying hot and wet tears begin to pool around my eyelashes.

I never cried over a guy.

Especially pricks like Edward.

So I sucked the tears back in and stalked out of the room before Alice could ask if I was okay.

She had followed me out of the room and caught up to me half way down the hall.

'Bella, wait up.'

I didn't turn around. I just continued my path away from Edward's room.

'If you want to, I'll drive you,' she had said lowly from behind.

I whipped around, glad I didn't have to walk home crying and brooding and just all pissed off.

'Are you okay?' she had asked when she saw my flustered face.

I tried to smile but couldn't.

'Did he say something to you?' she went to hold my limp hand.

I shook my head.

'No, I just thought we were friends. That's all.'

Alice sighed as she led me down the stairs and toward the kitchen.

'Bella, there's something you need to know about my brother,' she started, all cryptic as she stood facing me.

I just let her continue.

'Emmett and I are both biological siblings, Edward is our adopted brother.'

Alice let the words sink in.

'What?' I asked, completely stunned.

'Well when Edward was eleven, my father was his doctor at the Seattle hospital. Something had happened with his parents and he was newly orphaned,' she spoke while digging through her bag for her car keys.

'Come on, I'll take you home,' she guided me through a door to the garage when she had fished her keys out of her designer bag.

'So, what happened to his parents?' I asked, my tears forgotten.

'I'm not quite sure,' Alice started as we hopped into her Porsche, 'only Edward and my Parents know.'

I shook my head.

I honestly couldn't believe my ears.

'So Edward was eventually adopted as a Cullen and only select few people know about it.'

My eyes widened as I realised I had become one of those select few.

'Will he be angry if he knew you told me?' I asked as Alice let the garage door open automatically.

'Probably,' she shrugged, 'only Jasper, Emmett, I and my parents know.'

I furrowed my brow, trying to get my head around it all.

'What about Rosalie?' I wondered aloud.

Alice bit her lower lip for a moment before answering.

'Well, I was only allowed to tell Jasper because we're together,' she had pulled out of the driveway now. Trees were whirling past in a huge blur as her car slipped through the traffic.

'Rosalie doesn't know because she isn't that close to Edward. Despite trying,' she added.

I thought about this for a moment.

'So Rosalie wants Edward?' my heart sank at the tidbit of information.

The sky outside had turned grey from the thick clouds that threatened rain. Alice was still thinking about her answer.

'Well,' Alice started, almost amused, 'she kind of chops and changes her mind.'

'About what?' I asked, beginning to dislike Rosalie.

Why couldn't she just make up her mind?

I mean, Edward was gorgeous.

'Okay, she is into both of my brothers. Emmett has always had the hugest thing for her and Edward never did.

'Rosalie loves a challenge, so Edward was more a conquest than anything else. Especially considering Emmett was so easy.'

I heard Alice laugh, it was like bells ringing.

'She never got Edward though, and it still pisses her off.'

I looked away from Alice's concentrating face as she attempted to cross lanes in the wild traffic.

'Why didn't Edward want her?' I asked quietly, hoping she wouldn't make anything out of it.

'No one really knows,' she began, 'it's like with his past. You can only assume why because he isn't likely to talk about it.'

'So you think that may be why his moods suddenly change?' I heard myself ask.

'Well yeah, I mean it must be hard for him,' she sighed, pulling into my street. She looked at me then.

'You know, not having your real parents there for you,' she frowned as she turned the wheel into my drive.

'I think I understand, it was just a shock to hear about it,' I smiled back, the tears completely dried up.

'That's okay,' she kept the car idled, 'I know you won't say anything to anyone.'

'Of course not,' I reassured her.

'Well, this weekend I wanted everyone to go out. Maybe we would all go to the movies?' she smiled brightly, forgetting our previous topic.

'Okay,' I smiled back, feeling so much better, 'sure. What are we seeing then?'

She thought about it for a moment, her cute face tilting to the side.

'What about _Australia_?' she offered.

I had heard some pretty average reviews about it, but I didn't mind seeing it.

'Okay,' I grinned at her as I opened the door to get out, 'well, I guess I'll see you at school tomorrow.'

She beamed at me from the driver's seat.

'Definitely, see you then.'

Edward hadn't turned up to bio the next day.

Nor did he turn up the following day.

I would sit in front of Jasper, willing his tall figure to casually walk through the door.

Maybe he would even smile at me.

Or he wouldn't.

I just wished I could see him.

I was starting to forget his face and his smell.

And the third day, Thursday, I even kept my eyes on the doorway, hoping he was just late.

I passed people in the halls, wishing he would be there walking towards me.

I would smile, he would smile.

But no, Edward hadn't shown up for days.

It was very disconcerting.

And I really hated it.

And I hadn't gone to Alice's again, despite being invited.

Jasper refused to let me walk, so he would drop me off and then he'd just go back to hang out with Alice.

I was fine with walking. He wasn't.

All I really wanted was to see Edward again and assess him now I knew something else about him.

Would the knowledge of him having been adopted make him look any different to me? Would I immediately understand him?

Turns out I wouldn't.

Edward was there on Friday.

He had braved bio and was sitting beside Jasper.

It felt weird. Every day I was used to turning around and talking with Jasper about things, yet today I couldn't, Edward was there.

I didn't know what to think as I walked into the classroom.

Edward was there in his usual seat, avoiding me.

Jasper grinned at me as I walked into the room.

I just smiled back at him and took my seat in front of them.

I decided not to turn around like I would normally when it was just Jasper and me. So I opened my book and began writing the date in the right hand corner of the next clean page.

Then I felt a weird pushing on the back of my plastic chair.

It would have been Jasper trying to get my attention.

I turned around and caught the said boy's glance.

He smiled and began talking.

'Are you coming tonight?' he said low enough so Banner wouldn't hear.

I nodded, trying in earnest to avoid Edward and the way he aimlessly drew in his notebook.

'Great,' Jasper started, pulling his chair in so he could better talk to me, 'I think I'll drive... I guess you can come to Alice's after school?'

'Yeah sure,' I said quietly, giving Jasper a wide grin.

Edward briefly looked up at the sound of my voice, but quickly looked back down again.

I rolled my eyes, unaware that Jasper was watching.

He just chuckled, nodding for me turn around as Mike had been trying to get my attention.

He held a piece of paper out for me.

And I took it warily, opening it as I turned to face Jasper again.

The look on his face was priceless as he eyed the small piece of paper in his hand like it was a gold diamond ring.

I read it and my jaw dropped.

Mike had just asked me out during bio and through a stupid note while Banner prattled on about the reproductive organs of rats.

Fantastic.

Absolute gold.

I groaned, turning around to write my refusal out.

Mike was supposed to like Jessica, not me.

His face fell when he read my reply.

I added that he should ask Jess out.

Maybe he would.

So Mike turned around and discarded my note.

I felt sorry for him, I really did.

Jasper had seen the exchange from behind me and was laughing quietly as I turned around.

He had stolen the note and was reading.

He nudged Edward awake from where his head lay in his arms on the desk.

He forced the note under his nose, the whole time doubled over in laughter.

I thought it was horrible, yet funny at the same time.

Mike had poked me again and handed me another note.

Right. Here we go.

At this point, Edward and Jasper were both laughing at first note and didn't notice him pass me another one.

Poor Mike.

Wait, I take that back.

His god-awful scribble was disgusting.

He was asking if I liked Edward's... what?!

What on Earth?

What a dickhead.

I just discarded the note on the desk beside me and began writing another back.

That was when Jasper picked up the new piece of paper and read.

I had tried to stop him.

God, I didn't want Edward reading that shit.

He burst out in raucous laughter.

Edward snatched the piece of paper from Jasper, his eyes going wide as he read what was said.

I turned my face away, already feeling the blood rise to my cheeks.

It was bloody awful.

But before I could do anything, Edward had written his own note and was glaring at Mike.

The latter seemed shocked as Edward thrust his own note back at him.

Mike read and his face fell.

I heard Jasper chuckling quietly behind me.

And Edward was still watching Mike menacingly.

And he refused to meet my gaze.

I just crossed my arms, irritated at the situation as it unfolded without any input from me.

I wanted to know what Edward had written. So I turned to him, encouraging him to look at me.

He didn't.

It was so infuriating.

So I spoke to him.

'What did you write?'

He didn't even look at me when he replied.

'I would have told you what I wrote if I really wanted to.'

He looked at me then.

'And I don't want to.'

I raised both eyebrows in surprise.

Where did Edward Cullen get off?

'You're such a prick,' I abused him, and he deserved it.

Adopted or not, he was mean.

'And you're annoying,' he pretended to not see me, 'turn around and stop bothering me.'

I felt my jaw drop.

Was he being serious?

'Fuck you,' I snapped at him and faced forward, already hating that I was doing what he said of me.

I heard his snort behind me.

'You wish.'

I closed my eyes in frustration, pretending I didn't just hear him say that.

I no longer felt sorry for him.

In fact, I almost hated him.

Well, as much as you can hate someone you constantly think about.

And dream about.

Once the bell had rung, I stormed out the classroom before anyone could even catch up. The last thing I needed was Jasper coming to apologise for his friend's behaviour.

I made the hard left into the swarming corridors as I trudged my way to my history classroom.

I tried to focus on the teacher rambling as to forget about Edward and his strange mood swings.

It didn't work at all.

So I was resigned once Jasper and Alice met me in the car park.

I just sat in the back seat, willing my head to think about something other than him and his words.

But I couldn't.

Even Alice noticed my tension.

Jasper explained it for me.

'Are you kidding me?' she asked, shocked. Then it was followed by a, 'you have got to be joking', and a, 'no fucking way'.

I just looked out the window, carefully pretending to ignore their conversation.

We pulled into Alice's house.

And I didn't know if Edward was coming tonight.

Either way I would pretend like he didn't exist.

Alice had hugged me as we walked into the house.

She squeezed tightly and I flinched a little. But she never noticed.

We got inside and I pulled my bag off my back.

I had brought a change of clothes so I didn't need to pass home before we went to movies.

An hour later and I was forced into the back of Jasper's Chevy with Edward and Emmett.

Rosalie had opted to drive her own car and was meeting us there.

So I was stuck in the middle of Emmett – the hugest guy I knew, and Edward, who seemed to be trying his hardest to keep his leg from touching mine.

I sat there seething.

He was only here because Alice had made him come.

When we stopped, I was going to have to have a word with him.

Or I could just ignore him.

Whatever worked really.

But as we stopped, I couldn't face him. So I just followed everyone into the theatre.

Australia was to start in ten minutes.

And Rosalie was already in there apparently.

So the tickets were bought and we all filed into the chairs in front of the big screen. We all sat in a line toward the middle.

Rosalie and Emmett down the further end, with Jasper and Alice in the middle. Then I sat on Alice's other side and Edward sat on the end next to me.

It felt weird.

I knew he would feel weird too.

You could just see it in the way he sat awkwardly beside me.

I decided to just ignore him completely, looking at the blank screen before me. He seemed to be in a different mood.

Strangely enough, he held out his popcorn for me, offering.

I snorted.

'You can't be serious,' I scoffed, eyeing him as he pulled the bag back toward himself. I must have pissed him off again.

'I was only being nice,' he said matter-of-factly, crossing his arms over his chest.

I rolled my eyes.

'Can you warn me next time your mood abruptly changes?' I demanded with a sneer.

He didn't answer, but sat rigid in his seat.

He was still for a moment before he spoke.

'I want to be friends,' he didn't smile and it made the whole thing incredibly cryptic.

'I thought we were,' I started as I turned toward him involuntarily, 'but I guess the whole 'fuck off' thing gets in the way right?'

I didn't mean to be so sarcastic.

It just came out unexpectedly.

And he surprised me, yet again.

'You told me to fuck off, remember?' he asked, getting irritated again.

I sighed dramatically, knowing full well that he was right.

'Whatever,' I snapped, wishing he would just be nice all the time.

'You're really narky today,' he observed as he offered me his popcorn again, smiling.

I looked at him from the corner of my eyes and tried to ignore him.

'Okay, so I can frustrate you,' he said quietly as the movie began, 'but you really need to lighten up a bit. I mean I could have been worse.'

I let my eyes open wide in shock.

Was he fricken serious?

Surely not.

So I turned to him, narrowing my eyes and snatched his popcorn away from him.

'That's for being a jerk off,' I said as quietly as I could despite the movie in the background.

'Save some for me,' he said as he started watching.

I let my eyes roam the screen as well.

Hugh Jackman was really hot.

But I couldn't focus at all on him, instead my whole body felt inclined towards Edward.

And I was still pissed at him.

It would take more than popcorn to make me happy again.

Trying to watch a movie with Edward sitting next to me was one of the hardest things I've had to experience.

I felt like a little kid ogling the cookie jar.

I could look but I couldn't touch.

It was so pathetic.

I even noted how his eyes shone whenever the screen would light up a bright colour. And I didn't even care if he noticed me staring.

And I knew he had noticed.

I saw him surreptitiously letting his eyes find my face.

And then would smile a knowing smile and continue watching the movie as he had beforehand.

I couldn't work him out.

And boy did I try.

It had me consumed that I couldn't work out how he managed to be so still during the entire length of the film.

And it was a three hour movie.

About halfway through he actually turned to me and asked what I thought of it. I just sighed, having been too busy thinking about him than paying attention to the movie...

'It's not how I pictured Australia,' I had said when I turned my head toward him for like the fiftieth time that night.

'It's not,' he grinned, 'there's a lot more city and lights.'

I just laughed.

'You've been there?' Now I was amazed.

'Yeah, when I was fifteen,' he went to dig a hand into his popcorn that I held.

I thought for a moment, trying to imagine him there.

How could I?

I hadn't been there.

He shoved a handful of popcorn into his mouth and turned his attention towards the screen again.

I decided to take a sip of the coke he had bought.

I had already drunk all of mine anyway.

And suddenly I really needed the bathroom.

So I stood up, deciding to leave my handbag on my seat, when Edward stood up as well.

'You going to the bathroom?' he asked, knowing me so well already.

I nodded and he let me past.

'I'll come too.'

So we walked out through the theatre doors and into the foyer where numerous banners for upcoming movies were hung from the ceiling.

I found the ladies room and made my way over, knowing that Edward would be following.

I didn't bother looking back at him as I went inside.

He was leaning against the wall casually when I came back out.

'You took forever,' he teased with a smirk, 'we've probably missed half the movie.'

I just rolled my eyes and stopped in front of him.

'Well, you wanted to come.'

He grinned at me, letting his perfectly white teeth shine in the dim light.

'That's true.'

Then he seemed to be straining to hear something.

And I heard it too.

It was one of the oldest songs I could remember hearing on the radio countdown when I was younger.

They were playing it over the speakers around the foyer where we stood.

'I know this song,' I almost laughed at Edward who was still trying to make it out.

'Me too,' he'd agreed with me, 'but I cannot for the life of me, remember what the name was or who the band is.'

I thought for a moment and the chorus came on.

I decided to repeat it, hoping the name would be in there somewhere.

'He's everything you want,' I mused and he followed me.

'He's everything you need,' we laughed simultaneously.

And then continued still.

'He's everything inside of you that you wish you could be.'

Then I put mine in.

'He says all the right things at exactly the right time.'

And then Edward had to end it.

Typical.

'But he means nothing to you and you don't know why.'

The laughter had died at the last line.

Neither awkward nor really comfortable, we both just stood there.

I was scared that perhaps he would have another drastic change in mood.

But he didn't.

'I remember who they are now,' he said without any humour.

I just looked upwards, into his remarkably hypnotising eyes.

'Vertical Horizon, and the song I'm pretty sure was called _Everything You Want_.'

'Yeah, I remember now,' I let myself smile, 'they were your typical nineties rock.'

Now this made him laugh.

'Yep, they were.'

We then made our way back to the theatre. I followed Edward as he disappeared into the dark.

His leather jacket was gone and he was wearing just a plain dark green, long-sleeved t-shirt that he had pulled up his lean forearms.

There were a few protuberant veins that snaked their way around his muscles under his snowy white skin.

He also had a sterling silver chain-sort-of-bracelet around his left wrist.

Something was engraved there, but I couldn't see what.

The sterling silver around his wrist matched the chain around his neck. It was only long enough to dip below his collarbone.

All in all, he dressed well.

Right down to his dark fitting jeans and shiny black shoes.

His bronze, almost copper coloured hair was the best part though.

The way it came back off his face as though he had just been in a photo shoot made my heart sink.

Could he be any more perfect?

Alright, his bizarre changes in mood made up for his god-like looks.

At least that made him somewhat normal.

Like me and my incredibly ordinary hair, face, body and personality.

Everything was brown, pale and dull.

That's how I saw it anyway. But then again, maybe I was just your average teenage girl who really didn't know any better or saw her image differently than everybody else.

At least I wasn't ugly.

Like intensely so.

Maybe I should at least try makeup?

Scratch that. Bella Swan does not wear makeup or heels or anything stupid like that.

At this point, Edward had turned to me with a puzzled expression.

We were both stumbling up the dark steps toward the rows of seats everybody was sitting at.

I thanked God that Edward couldn't hear my pathetic thoughts.

Sometimes being a girl really sucked.

But he just grinned widely at me and let me pass into the aisle first.

He didn't touch me or anything, but I felt like his hand might have been inching to.

It was like an imaginary warmth was spreading through the small of my back where he might have placed his hands, but didn't.

It was almost like his hand was hovering there before he quickly pulled away.

Maybe I was just insane. You know, it came with being a hormonal teenager.

Well, we both sat.

And we watched the movie, not looking at each other, or inching closer like the clichéd 'get together' scene in a romantic chick flick.

It didn't feel awkward, despite knowing what the other two couples down the row of seats who were doing.

I thought perhaps Edward ignored it simply because both his brother and sister were in there somewhere.

He was just ignorant of it.

I liked his way of doing things.

**Please review, it would make our days!! **


	5. We've Got A Big Mess On Our Hands

**Chapter Five: We've Got A Big Mess on Our Hands **

Saturdays were always fun.

It was just that _I_ didn't do Saturdays – they don't find _me_ fun.

So when Alice rang at bloody seven thirty that morning, I felt like throttling my godforsaken phone into the opposite wall.

She wanted to hang out again.

I took my usual five minutes to recover from being woken up and then let her talk.

'Okay, we haven't really done this before... as a group,' she had started timidly, so unlike Alice, 'but Emmett has this friend right...'

I just did your expected, 'yes...' quite slowly into the receiver.

'Well, he got us a few IDs for tonight,' she said this really quickly before moving on, 'and we we're thinking of going to Venom.'

I didn't say anything.

I was shocked. Since when could we even pass as eighteen, let alone twenty one? And into a nightclub?

Alice must have been able to read my mind.

'We have four Ids... All twenty-one,' she giggled into the phone.

I wondered for a moment.

Only four?

'So who's going then?' I asked, wondering if Edward would go.

She sighed a little, probably counting us off on her fingers.

'Well, Jazz, you, Emmett, Rosalie and myself,' I heard her say into the phone, 'I'm still working on Edward.'

I thought about it for a moment.

'Right, so say I go... How will only four Ids get us in?'

She snorted on the other line.

'Seriously Bella, why do you doubt me?' I thought about an answer to that but was abruptly interrupted.

'Oh, and James and few others have decided to come... they have their own Ids though,' Alice's voice sounded distant, 'and Edward said he'd only go if you went.'

I laughed mirthlessly.

'Really, he said that?'

'Well, he doesn't want to be the only one sober while Jasper gets drunk with Emmett and James. So seeing as you don't drink much...' she added, hoping I would take the bait.

And I did.

'Alright Alice,' I caved.

'Really, you're going to come?' she sounded giddy at the prospect.

'Yes, really, now details... where and when?'

'Just be at my place in an hour,' I looked up to the clock as she said this, groaning.

'Come on,' she whined, 'do you realise that you have to look the part to get into a club too?'

Oh, it was too much torture.

'Are you serious?' I whinged, imagining all sorts of torment as she would most definitely curl my hair, rub makeup into my face and spray god-awful perfume everywhere.

'Oh, suck it up, Bella,' Alice chastised before hanging up.

So an hour later I was at Alice's place, Jasper had picked me up.

I was sitting in her room with my hair in curlers – as I had expected – when I began musing.

I had met Alice and Emmett's parents.

And the people that had adopted Edward.

Now if I was a gold-digger with a soft spot for handsome middle aged men, Dr. Cullen would be the perfect catch.

Carlisle, as he had asked to be called, hadn't looked older than twenty-five.

Apparently he was forty odd.

And yet I couldn't stop staring at his straight blonde hair that framed his almost angelic face.

His piercing green eyes were just like Edward's, despite their being no biological connection.

And the way he doted on Edward... it was stunning to watch.

I could not forget one of the most beautiful women I had ever seen, Mrs. Cullen. Or Esme, as she preferred, graced me with a gorgeous smile.

Her caramel coloured locks fell exquisitely over her small shoulders to a perfectly proportioned body.

She was dainty like Alice. And I didn't know where Emmett had come from. Edward looked more like the Cullen parents than Emmett did.

Yet I was brought out of my musings when the former barged in.

The look on his face probably matched mine.

It looked like I had snakes in my hair.

I turned away quickly and he started laughing obscenely.

'Go away, Edward,' I snapped at him while his laughter increased in volume, 'I didn't ask for this.'

'You look absolutely ridiculous.'

I scoffed, refusing to turn around and face him.

'Thanks, a lot,' I muttered, 'it's what I aim for everyday.'

Alice walked in and herded him out, pushing him through the door.

Edward protested the whole way.

'I need to borrow some of your toothpaste,' I heard as Alice kept pushing, 'I've run out.'

'Well, it's good to know you've kept brushing your teeth, go borrow some of Emmett's,' Alice told him sternly.

'But I don't like his toothpaste,' I heard him whine.

'And why is that?' she pretended to care as she shut the door on him.

'It hasn't got those cool strips in them, you know...' I turned around and saw the door shut on him, only his voice was now muffled, 'the ones that give you an icy-fresh blast every wash.'

Alice and I doubled over in silent giggles, hoping Edward couldn't hear us laughing from the other side.

'Fine then,' he snapped like a toddler chucking a tantrum, 'I'll just go and buy some more.'

And then we heard his retreating footsteps.

Alice and I both recovered as she attempted to pull my hair out of the many curlers she had woven through it.

Then she decided to put them all back in again.

For Christ's sake!

Nevertheless, Alice moved over to her elaborate looking stereo and fluidly placed a shiny new CD inside.

'Right,' she started in casual conversation as she came back over to where I sat, 'the game plan. Let's call it: Operation Get into Venom.'

I just looked at her warily.

'Okay, so we have perfectly slutty outfits. That's number one out of the way.

'We have done up and sexy hair to match the slutty outfits. That's number two. Oh and of course the makeup... We can't forget the makeup.'

Alice prattled on, mentioning here and there what will be there, when we were going to meet up with others and how to get to and from the place.

The music she had placed in her stereo had begun, and the most eccentric guitar riff I had heard in a while broke her monologue.

'Oh I love this band,' she closed her eyes as she let herself hum a little. I honestly had never heard it before. When she opened her eyes again, she met my distant expression.

'They're called the Academy Is,' she graced me with a wide smile, 'cool name huh?'

I thought about that for a moment and then took the CD case from her.

It was burnt music but all the songs had pretty odd names.

And then Alice pointed to a poster on the wall.

The lead singer was pretty cute.

I just rolled my eyes as I realised that was probably why Alice liked them so much.

But then again, their music was really catchy.

Neighbours, the current song was called.

And then Alice brought me back to the problem at hand.

How to get from here to Venom was her main issue.

Alice's parents thought we were going to just another party.

So getting a lift from them would be out of the question.

A cab home would be on the agenda. But how to get there was still plaguing on our minds.

'Okay, we'll just drive and come and get the cars tomorrow,' she offered, and it sounded fair enough.

I agreed.

And then it came to actually getting in.

How on Earth were only four Ids going to be enough?

Alice laughed when I asked her.

'Bella, that's the easy part,' she had said with a devilish grin.

I only looked at her, willing her to continue.

'Okay, so this is me...' Alice said while holding up her mascara. I giggled at the reference, and then picked up her blunt and very short eyeliner.

'No Alice, this is you,' I then passed the pencil to her.

She grimaced, not seeing the humour.

'Fine,' she huffed, and then continued, 'and then this is Jazz, Rose and Em.'

Alice held up her mascara, a bottle of foundation and a bronzing brush for each respectively.

I had to laugh at the imagery.

'This can be you and Edward,' Alice held up a red lipstick and a lip pencil.

I rolled my eyes.

'So you and Edward stay here, outside,' she propped us up on the makeup stand, 'while the rest of us go inside with the Ids.'

Alice moved the four products away from the lipstick and lip-liner and into the loaded makeup case on the other side of the bench.

'Then Rose and Jazz will come back out with all four Ids,' she then brought the foundation and mascara out of the case to where the lipstick and lip pencil stood, 'they give you the Ids that Em and I used and you follow them in like so.'

Then Alice moved all four of us into the case so that everyone was inside, on only four Ids.

It should work right?

I just have to act confident, like a twenty-one year old would.

'So,' I began, eyeing Alice as she made her makeup products dance in her makeup case, 'what do these Ids look like?'

'Well,' she tittered, fishing though her Fendi bag for her purse, 'this will be yours and mine – seeing as we both have dark hair.'

Alice held up the Id of a woman I have never seen in my life.

And I snorted.

There was no way I looked anything like this Peggy Osborne from Ohio. What on Earth, and how was Alice supposed to look anything like this chick either?

My face was incredulous.

'You've got to be kidding me Alice!'

'What?' she look taken aback, 'as long as you look hot, it doesn't matter.'

'Are you serious?' I began, absolutely mortified, 'we'll never get in.'

'Bella, Bella,' she cooed, 'I have done this before...trust me.''Right okay,' I huffed, 'so when we get kicked out and sent to jail for underage drinking... what'll we do then?'

Alice only chuckled. 'Why would they send us to jail?'

'Are you forgetting who my father is?' I began, freaking out.

'Yeah, so what,' she started, 'you can't go to jail for underage drinking... the most they can do is kick us out.'

I looked at her stupidly.

'And call your parents,' she added quickly.

My eyes went wide.

Charlie would have my first born if he got wind of this.

He may never be around, but he wasn't a parent who let his kid run wild around town. I couldn't believe I was letting myself get into this.

'Well, we'll be fine,' Alice reassured me,' and I'm sure they won't even ask for Id if you look hot enough.'

I scoffed at her.

'I don't even look eighteen yet.'

Alice got a gleam in her eyes.

'Not when I'm done with you.'

Great. Perfect. Torture.

So the rest of the morning passed with me curled up on Alice's massive yellow bed with more curlers in my hair and an awkward mask of avocado and cucumber on my face.

It was disgusting.

So _girly_.

Eventually, I had found numerous magazines. Admittedly, they were all stupid girly ones like Vanity Fair or Cosmopolitan.

I was flicking through Cosmopolitan.

And the stereo was back to the Academy Is again. This one was catchier than the last.

The Phrase That Pays was the name.

And the magazine had Jessica Alba on the front.

About three quarters of the way through there was this strange 'sealed section'.

_I don't read these things, so bare with me._

And I was shocked.

So much so I slammed the magazine shut and called out to Alice.

She came running into the room from her bathroom, her mask into place as well.

'Is a curler falling out?' she started to worry.

'No, I found this,' I held up the magazine, opening it up to the sealed section that I had just opened.

Alice let out a large gust of air, calming down.

'Oh thank God it wasn't anything else,' she said as she took a seat on the end of the bed, 'I thought something horrible had happened from the way you screamed.'

I looked at her, incredulous, my eyebrows raised in question.

'And this isn't drastic?' I said loudly, completely shocked as I held the magazine open to many different sex positions on the first page.

Alice only grinned when she saw what I was referring to.

'Read the next page,' she went to get off the bed and walk back into the bathroom, 'erotic fiction is amazing.'

My eyes popped out of their sockets.

Was she being flipping serious?

Oh no, no way.

And the CD skipped to the next song, it was really quite fitting for the mood in the room.

Forever Young. Yes with Summer Hair – you all know the song.

Then Alice had reappeared from the bathroom with a stack of more magazines, all the sealed sections opened.

I couldn't believe my eyes.

Girls were barbaric.

I could only imagine what guys read.

Or more likely don't read, but stare at.

Then I heard Alice's bedroom door open and I immediately shut the magazine I held.

Alice squealed, pulling a flustered-looking Rosalie onto the bed with us.

I looked at her, glad it wasn't anyone else.

Rosalie smiled, it wasn't really warm, but it was a start.

'Hey,' I smiled back at her.

'What are you reading?' she leant over my lap, inspecting.

'Cosmo,' I said flatly, 'I haven't read this stuff before.'

'Oh, let me guess,' she flipped her long blonde curls behind her shoulder, 'you found the sealed section.'

We both laughed.

At least Rosalie got me.

'How vulgar,' she had whined with me, 'but they're so funny to read.'

So we sat on the bed together, all three of us and read aloud all the dirty and smutty stories from the magazines we were going through.

'His head dipped into the valley between her breasts, teasing and nipping as he went...' Alice had giggled out as she read the erotic fiction story from her Cosmo.

'Gosh Alice,' Rosalie snatched the magazine from her,' how old is this one?'

'June last year, I think,' she was still laughing, 'it doesn't even go all the way.'

I had started warming to the whole situation, as weird as it was for me. And it was time to read out mine, as Rosalie had gone first.

'Okay,' I breathed, really not wanting to say the words on the page.

'A Day at the Office,' I read the title, letting the words form on my lips, 'The day was a normal day. Jerry was sitting in his office with the usual paperwork, Elise in the computer cubicle next to mine.

'The only interesting thing was the new addition to the numerous workers of this monotonous office. His name was Heath, a foreigner.

'I couldn't wait to set my eyes on him. And sure enough, when I did, I wasn't disappointed.'

I looked up at Rosalie and Alice and saw their entranced faces.

And I smiled, laughing at the hilarity of the situation I was plummeting head first into.

So I kept reading.

'He had straight, smooth honey coloured hair that was short and cropped along with handsome blue eyes. He was tall, built and looked like sex.

'I thought it would be rude not to introduce myself, so I made my way over, careful to swing my hips gently with my stride.

'He noticed my little trick, turning to face me before we had even a close enough distance to speak yet.

'His smouldering eyes gave me a once over as he squared his shoulders and casually placed his large hands into the pockets of his black slacks.

'I couldn't help but grin as he let his perfect lips fall into an incredible half-smile. Heath had me, right there.

'I let each stiletto clad foot make a beeline to this god-like creature that only had eyes for me. His eyes surveyed the low-cut shirt I had chosen to wear this morning, and then he let them roam down to the tight pencil skirt that fit snugly over my voluptuous hips.

'I couldn't handle it anymore, I needed to touch him. So I placed my small hand upon his broad chest. He never let his eyes see anything else as he removed his hands from his pockets and placed one over mine on his chest.

'It was amazingly warm as it enveloped my cold fingers. And we didn't need to say any words. I knew what he wanted, he knew what I wanted.

'He didn't even look shocked when I ripped our hands away from his chest and began pulling him to a secluded area. The photocopying room.

'Once inside, I began ripping at his starched white and smooth button-down shirt. He followed my lead and let the buttons of my blouse fly everywhere with one tug.

'Soon it was a rush of frantic breathing and zipper pulling as he bent me over the photocopying machine. I let my long wavy chocolate hair fall over my shoulders and onto the glassy copier surface. I had on only my favourite lacy red bra and he had yet to pull down his boxers. And still, he wasn't going fast enough.

'If he didn't touch me soon, I knew I would cry out from the anticipation and give us away to everybody outside.'

I looked up from the magazine, my heart pumping loudly as I read.

Alice and Rose were staring, stunned.

So I kept reading.

'He finally answered my prayers and let his hands wander down to the hot, slick folds between my thighs. The pressure of his teasing fingers made-'

And I was cut off by a quiet clearing of the throat.

And the silence of the CD as it changed the song once again.

We've Got A Big Mess On Our Hands... tonight.

All three of us sat on Alice's bed, our heads turned toward Edward and Emmett who stood nervously in the doorway.

I nearly died of embarrassment.

Well, thank God Rose had the balls I didn't.

'Get the fuck out, Emmett Cullen,' she shrieked at him, 'you too Edward.'

Their faces were classic, probably mirroring mine.

_I always put myself in destructive situations._

'But we need toothpaste,' they both said in unison.

_Now we've got a big mess on our hands tonight._

Both Alice and Rosalie began throwing pillows at the door until it shut and the boys left.

_We've got a big big mess._

Then they started laughing. But I couldn't find it in me to think that it was funny.

I wanted to curl up and die of embarrassment.

_I don't look innocent._

Yet Rose slapped me on the back and pinched the magazine from me, continuing to read the story I had been before the intrusion.

Alice just grabbed my hand and pulled me up to the makeup counter.

There I immediately shut the stereo off.

Nobody noticed.

And it was time for more torture.

An hour and a half later I truly did look like a slut and a half.

The curls were falling loosely over my small shoulders, over the tight confines of my cleavage.

The dress was so not me.

Even as it clung snugly to my waist from under my bust, it was different and too tight.

I really wanted to take it off.

But Alice insisted that if I had the body to pull it off, I should just wear it.

So I got over it, gently fingering the tight material as it hugged my hips and thighs all the way down to just above my knee where the dress stopped.

It was a pretty blue colour, a royal blue that made my skin look awfully white.

It even had these tight sleeves that hugged my shoulders and arms.

It really did make my skin look white, like cream almost.

But I didn't mind, I didn't like the dark tanned skin anyway.

I didn't even like it on Rosalie.

And I told her so.

She thanked me and proceeded to wash off her self-tanner she'd just applied. And that was when Alice appeared from the bathroom, holding a silver belt and matching stiletto heels.

I had a flash back to the story I was just reading not long ago.

But I took them from her and tried to put the belt on.

Although it wouldn't fit.

'It's a waist belt, Bella,' Alice had laughed at my struggling, 'you need to put it here.'

She took the belt from me and clipped it together around my waist, just under my bra. It fit perfectly, and it looked cute too.

It had diamond-like crystals on the front part, which reminded me of a broach I had seen in a movie, but it was just cotton or latex material around the back.

And then that brought me to the shoes.

They weren't strappy, thank God.

But they were tall and closed in rounded about the toes.

I liked them. I just had to learn to walk in them.

And then Alice turned me around in front of the mirror.

'Alright, Bella,' she sighed and then began to point towards my bottom, 'see these lines here?'

I nodded, curious as to why she was pointing to my underwear lines.

Oh God. No.

And now we've got a big mess on our hands tonight.


	6. Raindrops

**Chapter Six: Raindrops**

**Okay, another Bella one guys.. Ed's up next tho, so hang on.**

**Alright, so this is a bit of a plot pusher lol, in english, i meant it's a little bit of a turning point for the two of them.**

**now, enjoy all that comes with pretty blue g-strings (ew).**

'Yeah, I have something for you,' she pulled out a new pair of underwear.

'What the hell, Alice!' I shrieked, refusing to even touch the bright blue thing she was shoving at me.

'You have to Bella,' she pulled on the full force of her puppy dog pout, 'don't be a bad sport.'

I let my jaw drop, refusing to take them.

'Why would I put myself through that? I mean come on, Alice!' I crossed my arms at her, 'a permanent pain in the arse!'

She only rolled her eyes, laughing as she insisted I take them.

'Just try it on at least,' she bargained, 'see how it makes a difference.'

I accepted the stupid and ugly lack of material.

'Fine,' I huffed out like a baby.

Five minutes later and I was donning a thong underneath my blue dress.

Fantastic.

But at least you couldn't see the ghost of my underwear.

And I felt the constant need to adjust myself.

But I restrained.

Alice and Rosalie wore just as revealing get ups.

Rosalie in deep red.

Alice in a mix of black and white.

Copious amounts of perfume were sprayed and we all left the room.

The guys were already ready.

And apparently we were eating out.

I didn't care what Edward thought of me as I walked down the steps with Alice and Rosalie, mainly because_ I_ was too busy staring at _him_.

Boy did he scrub up well.

He had these amazing fitted black slacks on with a crisp white shirt tucked in underneath a belt. His shiny black leather shoes looked as though they had just been polished to perfection.

He wore the same chain and bracelet which contrasted nicely with his pale skin. I let my eyes roam over his face, noting his clean and shaven jaw.

His hair was exactly as it always was.

Perfection.

I watched as he moved on the spot, nervous perhaps... I wasn't sure.

But it didn't bother me as I locked eyes with him.

I was close enough now to smell his cologne.

Oh my God.

It was like a mixture of geranium, gin and the ocean.

My eyes lolled back in my head as I inhaled.

I had to stop myself from crying out.

So I settled for just asking him about it.

'What are you wearing?' I asked him, indicating his cologne.

He looked indifferent.

'Coolwater.'

_I think I need a bucket of Coolwater, freezing cold water._

He didn't seem like himself.

Just a moment ago he was smiling and looked all nervous.

Now he looked sullen, resigned.

He was in a shitty mood again.

And this time I could tell. It was so frustrating. So I just walked off, over to where Jasper and Alice stood with Rose and Em.

'Hey Bella,' Emmett boomed, 'are you staying here tonight?'

I thought about that for a second.

I would have if Edward was in a decent mood, but now I just felt like shit. I mean what did I do this time?

Alice cut in before I could say anything.

'Yeah she is.'

I didn't even register what she had said. I was too busy looking over at Edward who stood alone by the door with his hands in his pockets, sulking.

I shook my head, willing his gorgeous and frustrating form to stop haunting my thoughts.

'Come on Bella,' I heard Jasper say as he pushed us all outside.

We all squeezed into his Chevy. Rose sat on Emmett's lap in the front. Jasper drove with Alice in between Edward and me in the back.

I tried my hardest not to look at Edward as he sat there seething.

God, he was just so confusing.

Weren't we meant to be friends?

Obviously not then.

Venom was huge, and you could hear a number of different types of music coming from the building.

In one instant I could hear r'n'b and in another I could hear rock.

As we made our way down in the massive line we had to line up in, I heard techno and then just normal pop.

I was going to stay away from the Britney Spears playing in whichever part of the club the pop was in.

Just when we were toward the front of the line, Alice got Edward and me to wait further down. And it was freezing, especially considering what I was wearing.

So grudgingly I followed him back a few places when Rose, Em, Jasper and Alice were all let in.

But only after careful scrutiny of their Ids.

I mean, it was expected wasn't it?

Rose and Jasper came back after about another five minutes, but during that time, Edward stood as still as statue. He wasn't even shivering like I was; I mean he didn't have a jacket on either.

I decided to break the silence.

It would be too loud to talk in there anyway.

'So what's wrong now?' I asked, exasperated.

He just shrugged, pretending not to see me.

I scoffed at him.

'So you go from happy to altogether shitty in the space of three seconds and you just shrug at me,' I fumed, refusing to look at him either.

'So what if I do?' he countered, getting angry now.

'Because it's frustrating,' I said while narrowing my eyes at him, 'you're so hot and cold... You know maybe that Katy Perry chick wrote her song about you.'

I let him have that to toy with.

God, he was such a jerk off.

He took no time in retaliating.

'Maybe she did,' he sneered at me, folding his arms, 'what does it matter to you if I'm hot and cold huh?'

I just rolled my eyes, maybe a little too dramatically.

'I thought we were meant to be friends, remember?' I shoved right back at him. I was so not putting up with his shit tonight.

'Whatever,' he resigned, still partially ignoring me, 'I don't care anyway.'

'Oh yeah, big hero,' I snapped at him, turning around and muttering, 'fucking pain in the arse.'

He had heard.

He went to grab me.

But as he did, Rose and Jasper finally came out.

Edward didn't even get a chance to touch me before I walked forward, letting Rose and Jasper come inline in front of us.

'How is it in there?' I asked Rose and she grinned.

'It's pretty good,' she said still smiling.

So we were approaching the front of the line again. There I could see a large bouncer who was checking the Ids and another who was watching to ensure no one snuck in.

I swallowed hard.

What if they knew straight away that I was only seventeen?

The nerves were becoming stabbing little butterflies in my stomach.

I needed to breathe a little better.

I wish Edward wasn't in such a bad mood, I mean he would at least be fun enough to keep me distracted while I freaked out.

The bouncer took one look at Rose and let her in straight away, but he asked for Jasper's and Edward's Ids.

I was next and was really freaking out.

I smiled tentatively as he looked me over.

'Go through, honey,' he said, not even bothering to check my Id.

I smiled confidently then, almost strutting as I met Jasper, Rose and Edward on the other inside.

Rosalie grinned back at me.

'You didn't get asked did you?'

I shook my head, laughing now.

'Well at least you know you're hot,' she went to grab me around the waist as she pulled me along. Edward and Jasper fell into our wake.

If I was hot enough to get into a club without Id, why did Edward seem so cold towards me?

I would never work him out.

And I was resigned once we met Alice and Emmett in a U-shaped booth with drinks already coming.

'So Bella,' Alice raised her eyebrows at me, 'you got in without your Id huh?'

I let her see my best smile as I went to take a sip of my mango Daiquiri.

'Yep,' we both laughed, wanting to get a little tipsy already.

We really should have eaten.

Apparently the boys had. Why do we always miss out?

Rose went to get up and Emmett stopped her.

'Where are you going?' he said as he almost knocked over his Jack and coke.

'I want to dance,' she started, then looked over at Alice and I, 'you guys coming?'

I thought about it for a moment and then agreed.

Alice wanted to dance, but not just yet.

So Rose and I left the boys and Alice at the booth and made our way into the crowd of people dancing around the main dance floor.

It was here that the music changed between the different genres.

At the moment, Rose and I started dancing to hip hop. T.I. it was.

The song was stupid, but boy was it catchy.

We bent our knees slightly and let our arms twirl about above our heads. Eventually we got closer and started grinding on each other.

We didn't care if every male in the vicinity was looking; we were having fun after all.

I laughed as Rose started mouthing the lyrics and shaking her head as though she was a black rapper.

'Late night sex so wet you're so tight...' she said aloud, grabbing my arse and pretending to slap it like a gangster would.

That was when I noticed James walking through the crowd of people. He had a stupid leather jacket on, not like Edward's.

And he was making a beeline for Rose and me.

And then the song changed.

No Doubt started playing.

_The waves keep on crashing on me for some reason..._

And he kept his eyes on us, intent written all over his face.

I watched as he slid his way through couples and groups of dancers with his eyes fixed on mine.

I didn't know what to do.

I couldn't walk away, so I clung onto Rose.

She stopped dancing and was watching James too.

He got close enough to talk to us.

So he shouted over the music.

'Ladies,' he grinned wickedly, 'how are we this evening?'

Rose had no idea what he was really like, so she went in to hug him.

His eyes lit up as her chest touched his.

What a dirty bastard.

'Bella,' he opened his arms for a hug.

I refused him and began walking away.

Sadly, I tripped at the perfect time.

Before I could get out of the crowd of people and into the sight of Alice, James had bent down to pick me up.

His hand lingered just a little too long on my waist.

I tried to push it away, but I had had a little too much to drink.

I had not the strength.

And he thought it was funny.

'A little vulnerable, are we?' he said quietly in my ear, holding a lock of my curls between his fingers, 'I can look after you.'

My heart beat began racing.

I just needed to get out of here.

But I wasn't strong enough, nor could I make my feet move fast enough.

He leant toward me, smelling the skin just under my jaw.

I did not want him there.

I tried pushing him away, but he held on tightly.

He moved his cold face to kiss my cheek. He was going to kiss a line to my lips even though I fought against him and his hard touch.

I tried pulling my head away from his, but he aggressively held my head still between his calloused hands.

It was too much.

It was beginning to hurt.

I didn't know what to do, so I decided to try kneeing him.

Even slightly tipsy, I managed to get my knee high enough.

James only grabbed it as though it was an invitation to spread my legs. So I did the only thing I could. I told him loudly enough where to go.

'Fuck off, James... Leave me alone,' I sounded more like a whining child as I closed my eyes and bracing for the worst.

But it seemed to have worked as he let go.

Why would he let go so easily?

A different touch took my arms into an embrace.

'Jesus Christ Bella,' I heard a smooth voice say. I felt like I was being pushed elsewhere.

I opened my eyes and saw someone pushing me back into the crowd of dancers. I was confused.

'Where'd James go?' I asked a little out of it.

'I left him back there with a sore heart,' I heard the voice begin to yell over the loud music.

'Thank you, I thought he would never stop,' I turned around to face my saviour.

Edward stood before me, gripping my waist as he led us onto the packed dance floor.

'James doesn't know when to accept that he's not going to get what he wants.'

I looked up at him and made an alcohol fuelled choice to wrap my arms around his neck.

I would prefer Edward over James any day.

'We need to stop meeting like this,' he sighed as he let his hands find my hips.

And the music had changed again.

Raindrops began playing.

I pushed into him, letting my body feel his.

He was solid and warm and all cosy as I brought my hands around his back.

I felt his smile as he leant his head on the top of my mine.

That was what alcohol did to you.

It makes you less aware and so much more comfortable.

I heard the lyrics in my head, just enjoying the good mood Edward was in.

I felt him bring my head up.

He wanted to meet my gaze.

And I let him.

He held his hands on either side of my face as he peered down into my eyes.

I felt like I knew what was supposed to happen, but my brain wouldn't register.

Even as he slowly inched his face closer to mine.

His breath fanned out across my face now, warming me up.

And I suddenly knew what he was doing.

So I reached up and cupped his cheek with one hand and knotted his silky hair with the other.

My eyes kept darting between his full red-lips and his enchanting green eyes.

It felt like forever as I waited for his lips to connect with mine.

Well, forever was definitely worth the wait.

He closed the distance slowly, as though he didn't do this kind of thing much. And I felt the soft fullness of his lips catch mine.

My body went limp in his arms as he pulled me closer.

And I could feel every ridge and solid plane of his body as he pushed us together, moving his lips with mine.

It was like nothing I had ever felt.

There was such a difference between his kisses and someone else's like James or even Mike.

I didn't mean to feel it, but a thousand electric shocks shuddered through my fingertips right into the dead centre of my chest.

And then he opened his mouth, all hot and wet as he left feather-like touches upon my arms and hips with his clever hands.

It truly did feel like raindrops on my skin.

It felt so amazing, I had to get more.

So I tilted my head, giving him better access to the recesses of my mouth.

And his tongue found mine in one swift movement.

I moaned into his mouth which only seemed to spur him further.

I didn't know what in particular I wanted. And I suddenly wanted everything at once.

I wanted him to push me against a wall, down onto a bed and even over a photocopier!

This wasn't like me.

Nor was it like me to wrap my hands around him and pull our hips together.

Oh God.

I could feel everything.

But that didn't stop me. It just kept me wanting more.

But he must have needed to stop there.

He slowly pulled away, chastely kissing my lips a few times before looking down at me and smiling widely.

'I'm so used to feeling alone,' he pulled me into a hug again, 'it's nice to feel differently sometimes.'

And finally, a glimpse of the real Edward Cullen.

**Please review, poppetts. We need some feedback. I mean what if its absolutely 'orrible?**

**let us know kids xx**


	7. Time Is Running Out

**Chapter Seven: Time Is Running Out**

**Alright kids, another one for tonight… I know!! Yay. It's an Eddie Chapter. We are currently working on the next lol. Yes, it is going to be pretty amazing. Well, I know I'm creaming my pants. Alright, sorry. I don't mean to be so damn crass!**

**Right enjoy, we write this for you xx**

I don't know what came over me.

She looked beautiful, even as the alcohol started to affect her.

And I just needed to feel her eyes on mine. I kept getting closer, and closer towards her face, my breathing becoming irregular.

_Should I even be doing this? What we have is already fucked up._

Once I felt Bella's hands cup my cheek and grab my hair, I knew nothing else mattered.

She had me. And she was well aware of what I was about to do.

I leaned in closer to her tantalizing lips, at a steady, slow pace. My lips then grazed hers, forceful and yet gentle. They felt unbelievable against mine. I couldn't find the urge to stop.

Instead, being the idiot I am, I put my hands on her curvy hips and pulled her closer towards me. Being this close, it was the safest I had felt in a long time.

And our lips were moving together at a more rapid pace, but still I wanted more. I needed to deepen the kiss. I needed to feel her tongue dance with mine.

I parted my lips and let my tongue enter her mouth. And her head titled to the right, allowing me better entry.

And then, I heard her delicate moan inside my mouth.

_Fuck. My toes are starting to curl within my shoes. _

Every part of my body responded immediately to that one moan. And I knew she was enjoying this just as much as I was.

I felt her delicate hands wrap around me, as she fucking pushed our hips together.

She had to go there didn't she?

I tried so hard not to let the groan escape my lips as I felt her. Her body felt incredible pushed up against mine.

The way her hips met her waist, dipping and arching in the most gorgeous, curvaceous ways. I loved how her chest rubbed up against mine, those soft mounds pushed up against mine.

And the way she smelt!

Like cherries, strawberries and chocolate. Fuck.

My body was responding against my will. Much to my embarrassment, I know she could feel that I was as hard as steel. Before she even had the chance the pull our hips together closer, I had to stop. I needed to pull away before I didn't have the decency to.

_Although I really do want to feel her hips brush up against my groin, harder... _

_No. I can't let myself go there. Not now. Not here. _

I slowly pulled away, leaving her with gentle kisses. And I was smiling like a bloody goofball.

Harden the fuck up, Edward!

I spoke as I pulled her into a hug,

'I'm so used to feeling alone, it's nice to feel differently sometimes.'

_Me and my fucking big mouth! I had to speak didn't I?_

I don't know why I had said it. It just came out.

I think it was the truth.

And for the first time, it actually felt safe telling the truth.

'Edward! Bella!'

Shit. Alice.

I quickly moved an inch further away from Bella as Alice was coming closer towards us.

'There you both are! Everyone's been looking for you for ages, we're ready to leave. Two cabs are here, you and Bella can go in one, and Jasper and I will go with Rosalie and Emmett, okay?'

'Ah, yeah okay. Sure, Alice. We're right behind you.' I was hoping she couldn't spot the irregularity in my breathing. I was panting fiercely.

That being said, Alice then led us towards the back entry where the cabs were waiting for us. And the whole time Bella had her eyes focused on her feet, as if she was avoiding contact.

_Please don't let shit already be weird between us. _

I gently placed my hand on Bella's lower back to motion her towards the closest cab, and opened the door for her. I decided to sit at the back with her.

Public transport was kind of disgusting, and to tell you the truth I didn't particularly look forward to sitting at the front with some overly large bald guy, who looked like he hadn't showered in a month… or two.

I was so tempted to put my arm around her, but I just didn't know how. What was too much? What if it meant more to her? What if it meant nothing to her, and something to me?

_Fuck, why do I think so much?_

All we did was kiss.

Okay, it was a fucking good kiss. And I can be absolutely positive that it will be reoccurring in my memories during my dreams, and while I shower.

But, I didn't want to rush something that could be nothing. Or something still! Ah, who knows. Fucking stupid relationships! Why can't we all just be asexual?

We just sat in comfortable silence while I ranted relentlessly in my over-crowded head.

Every now and then she would look up at me with her brown glassy eyes, and smirk while nervously knotting her hair around her finger. She was acting like a little kid. A little kid who did something naughty and knew she had gotten away with it.

_I was fucking loving it._

Both cabs arrived home at the same time.

I waited for the others to make their way inside their house before Bella and I got out. I didn't know what it would be like now.

How am I supposed to act around her?

Especially tonight, I mean, she was staying at my house after all...

To my surprise, Jasper and Rosalie had no intentions of staying the night. They both were expected home.

Great.

Now Alice is going to be even more suspicious.

'Bella, I'm beat! Let's go wash up and change and go to bed, yeah?' She was whining just a little.

At least Bella won't be around me for much longer, and maybe I can try to comprehend tonight's actions.

Bella inhaled deeply, causing her to yawn.

'Sure Alice, I'm pretty tired too.'

Alice wasted no time in snatching Bella away and heading towards her room. Bella stopped midway up the stairs, and turned towards me.

She just looked, gazing with sleepy eyes. It was as if her heart-shaped face was telling me a story, a secret even. She looked so torn, and confused.

But then her tongue slowly left her mouth to lick her lips, like she had made her mind up about something.

_The thoughts came rushing back. I wanted to feel her tongue against mine, I needed to taste her._

'Goodnight Edward,' she spoke with a smile, 'sweet dreams.'

_Oh I'll definitely be having sweet dreams, thanks to you._

'Night Bella, Alice.'

And then they were gone.

I was kind of tired myself, but too wired up to sleep.

I couldn't wait to just relax on my bed.

Man my bed felt good. Kind of like silk against my skin… Kind of like Bella against-

_Okay, Edward. Just fucking stop it, right there!_

But still, my whole room felt good, just to be there again alone with my thoughts.

Actually probably not a good thing right now, when all I can fucking think about is Bella.

Her lips were just so... so… soft and plump. And she had these little red bite marks on her bottom right lip where she would nervously bite at them - way too often. But I found myself wanting to be those marks. I wanted to leave my teeth marks on her.

It took every ounce of my body to pull away from her earlier that night. I didn't want to. I mean, I _really_ didn't want to. But I know what would have happened if I didn't.

I probably would've taken her right there on the spot. The feeling of her warm body pressed up against mine, as she brushed my groin - _fuck I was getting hard just thinking about it. _

It was fucking sexy. She wanted it, and not nearly as much as I did I'm sure. But fuck yes, some part of her wanted it, wanted me.

_Wait. I thought she wanted me? Yeah, I doubt it. Maybe she just was horny._

I couldn't help but snicker to myself. Bella. Horny? She comes across so innocent. I'd love to be the one to change that. Release the beast within.

_Man the things I would do if Bella was with me in my room right now..._

I wanted to finish what we had started. There were so many other things I want to do to her. I wanted to tease her. I wanted to please her, until she's begging for me. I wanted her to scream my name so ear-piercingly loud that everyone would fucking hear us. I wanted her to moan in my mouth, over and over and over again.

_Fuck. I need a shower. An ice cold shower to release this tension. _

The cold droplets definitely calmed me down.

It was just what I needed.

As I stepped out I grabbed a clean white towel and wrapped it around my waist, while plugging my iPod headphones in my ears. There wasn't much point in putting my clothes on. I mean, I was going to go to bed soon anyway.

And I was still too hot and bothered to be honest.

Maybe the lack of clothes would have helped me out.

Then as the song changed, I heard strange noises. I couldn't make out what they were, but it sounded like somebody was in my room.

_Who the fuck could it be at this time of night?_

And fuck, there she was. In my bedroom and_ s_tanding in front of me. She was looking me up and down. When she noticed I was only in a towel, I could've sworn she smirked and greedily bit her lower lip. I couldn't help but stare at her either.

There she was in front of me, in nothing but a singlet that appeared to be too loose on her shoulders and black lacy underwear.

_Shit. Must remember I am not wearing pants right now. Calm down._

It was only then that I started to pay attention to the lyrics of the Muse song that had started playing on my iPod.

_"You're something beautiful, a contradiction. _

_I wanna play the game, I want the friction._

_You will be the death of me."_

Well, Bella. You _will_ be the death of me.

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	8. Alive

**Chapter Eight: Alive**

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I ripped the earphones out.

_What is she doing in here?_

Oh that's right. I had practically dry fucked her in Venom.

_Jesus Christ._

But she didn't seem to mind as she sauntered my way. I mean, not just sauntered, but really swayed those hips.

Oh god.

Couldn't she wear something else?

I mean the look of pain on my face right then must have be hilarious.

Or maybe Bella found it endearing?

_Who fucking knows. _

It seemed she did, however. She must have still been pretty drunk. I mean, Bella wasn't usually like _this_.

I found myself gaping as she came to a dead stop just inches from me. I could just make out the curve of her breasts in the singlet she wore.

And the dark mood of the room didn't help either.

But I so desperately needed to touch her.

I ached to touch the soft texture of her breasts.

_Fucking stop it, Edward!_

_Argh_.

I was more confused than a pubescent or an older woman going through menopause.

I didn't even know what I wanted.

And my moods were no help either.

But it became pretty bloody obvious what Bella wanted, especially when she reached out to touch a glistening droplet of water on my chest.

I felt myself instinctively relax at her touch.

It wasn't something that happened every day.

_I mean, I have some pretty intense trust issues you know._

But it made me confident enough to reach out for her, to take her hand.

She blushed then and I found it difficult to determine why.

I mean, I only grabbed her hand. Even though, yes I do admit, it might have been touching my bare chest.

But she was the one standing in my room half naked.

I chuckled then, realising how weird it might have seemed to an onlooker.

'What?' she asked. Her voice was louder than I was expecting.

'Nothing, I need to put some clothes on though.'

She shrugged, allowing me a moment to dress.

I came back with boxers and a singlet on.

_Thank God for the heating Carlisle installed a couple of years ago._

Bella watched me as I made my way over to the bed where she sat, already under the covers.

She smiled up at me. 'Want to play a game?'

I looked at her dubiously. 'What kind of game are we talking about?'

She pretended to think for a moment. 'Okay we'll go through your iPod while it's on shuffle, each taking a turn to guess the song playing before we check what it actually is.'

I looked at her, raising an eyebrow.

_Does she realise that it's my iPod, and I already know everything on there?_

Apparently not.

'So on what terms exactly?' I heard myself ask.

She grinned wickedly at this. 'If you get it wrong, you have to do something I tell you to do and if I get it wrong,_ I_ have to do something _you_ tell me to do.'

I thought about that for a moment. Yes, this could work well.

'Alright,' I said as I grabbed my iPod from the bedside table, 'you go first.'

I handed her my iPod and we each took an earphone.

Our heads were so close together, I could almost feel her warmth infecting me.

She turned the device onto shuffle and the first song came on.

I knew it, but I couldn't remember the name, or the bloody artist.

It had a unique guitar riff between the choruses.

_Old friend of mine, we will never lose the time that we've shared all these years, these years._

The woman singing had such a distinct voice

_Will you make it in the end, through all the twists and bends?_

I struggled still, Bella quietly chuckling beside me.

I mean seriously, I had gone to this concert!

Oh. Killing Heidi. I remembered finally.

'Killing Heidi, Weir,' I said triumphantly. Bella screwed up her face and huffed, defeated.

It was my turn now.

I hit shuffle again and the Stereophonics started playing.

_Thinking about thinking of you._

Bella sighed. 'I love this song.'

_You made me feel like the one. You made me feel like the one. The one..._

She smiled, closed her eyes and started swaying.

_I don't know where we are going now..._

'It's Dakota,' she opened her eyes now, 'by Stereophonics.'

My mouth hung open. She was good.

Then she snatched the iPod from me and shuffled it again.

I heard the strangest guitar riff ever. Then it was coupled with an acoustic guitar. Oh I knew this song. I had added it on here two years ago. I loved it. But I couldn't remember the band.

'I know it's Take a Picture,' I told her, watching as she grinned widely. She knew I couldn't remember the band's name.

'Who's it by?' she asked, toying with me.

I sighed, resigned.

'Alright,' I rolled my eyes, expecting the worst punishment, 'who then?'

She laughed wickedly. 'Filter.'

I cringed. How did I not remember that?

Oh well.

Bella had a devious look in her eyes as she fiddled with the comforter over the both of us.

'Anything you would like to say before I slaughter you?' she asked, cocking an eyebrow at me.

I chuckled. Of course she would make this incredibly melodramatic.

'Please, enlighten Miss Bella. What do you plan on subjecting me to?'

She grinned devilishly. 'You, sir, have to kiss my feet and each of my toes.'

I looked at her, disgust written all over my face.

'Oh, you've taken it to the next level.'

She laughed and fell back into the sheets, stretching her legs and feet out.

She was bloody lucky she had cute feet.

Fucking hell, there would be no way she would get me near anyone else's.

So I prepared for the worst as I descended into the realms of sheets that were my bed. She had little feet, red nail polish on each toenail.

I couldn't help but smile.

Thank God they were clean.

So I decided to kiss the top of her right foot. I heard her suppress a giggle. And my Lord where her feet cold!

I then wrapped my hands around the foot I had kissed, hoping to warm them up for her. I felt her toes do a dance within the lock of my hands as she sighed contentedly.

'That actually feels good,' she half-laughed, half-moaned.

I quickly brushed off the lurching feeling in my gut when she made such noises.

By that point I had gotten used to her feet. They weren't like my grandmother's or something.

Well that worked to settle myself down.

_Think about Grandma Edward!_

So I bent down to kiss her littlest toe on the same foot that I was holding. I felt her flinch, and I couldn't help but laugh.

Then I decided to do the same to the next one in.

That was until I eventually found her big toe. And I couldn't resist. I had to do it.

I took it into my mouth.

And I heard her gasp. Then giggle just a little before squirming. I had to hold her still.

'Edward!' she whined, lifting up the blankets to catch me in the act.

And because I was a real jerk sometimes, I held her by the ankles really tight and brushed my finger over the tender skin of the arch of her foot.

That had her going.

She wasn't just squirming. She was writhing as I tickled her beyond giggles.

She was almost out of breath by the time I was finished with her.

'Edward stop!' she half-panted, half-giggled.

I loved to watch her squirm, so I teased her a little more. 'And what are you going to do when I stop?'

She had now decided to sit up and make a lunge for me, but I pushed her back down.

'I'm going to find the nearest baseball bat and find _your_ most prized possession,' she had threatened. I just laughed with more mirth than I should have.

'I mean it, Edward!' Okay, so I gave up when she started threatening. But it was just so cute to watch.

_What the fuck! _

Since when did Edward Cullen say _cute_?

By that time I had realised that I had gone a whole hour or so without over-thinking anything.

Edward Cullen was stepping up in the world.

So I made the most of it and crawled into the spot next to her. I let myself actually sit close enough to touch her with my arms and even my legs.

She seemed to like that. I knew it when she grinned up at me. She liked having me close.

_Amazing, someone does actually want me._

And Bella too, it wasn't some stupid, painful girl from the cheerleading squad at school.

I suddenly felt very warm.

And confident.

I was letting Bella Swan in.

It was a slow moving process though.

'Right, my turn,' I went to grab the iPod again and shuffle the songs.

Nice, it landed on an all time favourite.

I listened to the deep voice of Eagle Eyed Cherry as our heads leant against each other.

I heard her sigh. 'I know this, but it's one of those songs that your parents had listened to and you never bothered to ask what it was called.'

Yes, she had given up.

'It's Eagle Eyed Cherry,' I grinned, taking my head away and looking down into her deep brown eyes, 'save tonight, it's called.'

'It's so good,' she closed her eyes, swaying with the music.

'Now before you get too comfortable,' I warned, 'remember who just lost that round?'

She huffed. 'Yes, me I know.'

I braced myself.

'Okay, Miss Swan. I demand that you get into a comfortable position, and you're not to move, laugh or even smile for five minutes solid.'

She rolled her eyes. 'Easy.'

I smirked. Yeah easy, right.

So she laid back into the sheets, closing her eyes.

I tried to suppress my laughter as I moved my head to hers. I started blowing hot air underneath her ear, just where the sensitive skin was most receptive.

Yep, I heard it. Her muffled giggling danced around us as I bit down on her earlobe.

But I wanted to try something else.

So I let my tongue skirt out and taste the skin on her neck.

It was salty and yet sweet at the same time.

I couldn't get enough.

I kept my tongue circling the delicate skin under her ears and behind her jaw as she started breathing heavily from under me.

Every time she would inhale, her chest would rise up enough to just gently touch mine.

_Oh the feeling of it!_

Yet I was still careful not to let my body touch hers as I hovered above, but I had this nagging feeling somewhere that just kept telling me to close the distance between our bodies.

But I wanted to tease her some more.

So I open my mouth and found a decent patch of skin on her neck. There I sucked as hard as I could. And she fucking moaned.

I came away instantly, remembering to think about grandma.

_Grandma, grandma, grandma... _

I just wanted my dick to have an 'off' button.

_Grandma, grandma, grandma..._

Okay, it wasn't working.

_Grandma and Grandpa in the sack, Grandma and Grandpa in the sack..._

That worked.

So I let myself look back Bella.

She was underneath me wearing the strangest expression I had seen.

Her eyes were hooded, she was licking her bottom lip hard and she was still trying to get her breath back.

And then, when she saw me watching her, she grabbed the iPod from between us and shuffled it again.

Alive by POD started playing. But I couldn't find the heart to actually admit I knew it. I wanted to see what she had up her sleeve.

_Every day is a new day._

I shrugged at her. She replied correctly, it was POD.

_I take four for every breath I take._

She grinned wickedly again, and I sat back off of her.

_I won't take you for granted._

'I want you to state the Gettysburg Address without making a mistake.' She had an evil look in her eye.

_So I learn from my mistakes._

I just shrugged, expecting her worst.

_So I trusted love._

'Four score and seven years ago, our father...' that was when Bella decided to sit right in front of me, staring unblinkingly. Oh now my mind deviated to a bloody prayer, '...who art in heaven, hallowed by they na-'.

Bella chuckled. 'Wrong, start again Edward.'

'Four score and...' she then used her index and middle finger to walk her hand down her chest. She was teasing me.

I watched as she let her hand rest on her right hand breast.

Oh God.

'...that all men were created equal...' I kept up my chanting.

She opened her mouth just a little to casually bite her lower lip, sucking it. I started losing track of the speech. '...we are met here on that great...'

She almost had me undone.

But nothing could compare to when she open-palmed her own chest, her eyes hooded and rolling into the back of her head. I cracked.

_Fuck the stupid speech. Who cares if Abraham Lincoln made it?_

So I lunged for her, pulling her on top of me and under the sheets.

I heard her boundless giggles as I gripped her hips, rocking them just a little.

She must have been able to feel some friction. For that was enough to stop the giggles and start the other noises.

'Edward,' she almost moaned, gripping my face between her small hands.

I captured her lips with mine again, the song still playing in the back ground.

_I feel so alive. For the very first time, I can't deny you._

It was egging me on, telling me to touch her in places I had never even dreamt of.

That was when she began straddling my lower torso. And I could feel the hot, wet slickness from between her legs. It was incredible.

I longed to touch her. Anywhere.

So I started by gripping her thighs. My hands were large enough to cover the skin there in one caress.

_And now that I know you, I could never turn my back away._

She broke our chaste kiss only to pull my lower lip away and bite down hard. And I wanted there to be blood there. I prayed for it. And then I opened my eyes as she let me go. The poor excuse for clothing she was wearing had ridden up considerably. Her pale glory was unbelievable to my eyes.

_And now that I see you, I could never look away._

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	9. This is Twice Now

**This is Twice Now**

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'_Cos I stole your soul._

Edward's iPod had changed songs. It was loud enough to hear the voice of the lead singer. And in the meantime, he hadn't moved. He just went rigid, staring blatantly.

So I stopped too, hoping he wasn't going into another weird mood swing.

At this point, I was sitting - no straddling his lower torso. The silence between us was reaching some kind of precipice.

_What do I say? _My earlier bravado was wearing away, and yes alcohol had something to do with it.

So I cleared my throat awkwardly. He took that and started talking.

'Bella,' he addressed me curtly and I half expected him to push me off,' if this continues, I won't be able to stop.'

I stopped breathing, yet I was immediately relieved that he hadn't thrown me another mood swing.

'Um, Edward,' I started as I pulled myself off him voluntarily, 'you seem to be good at killing moods.'

He looked surprised then, turning his head to the side to look at me. 'Killing moods?'

I chuckled for his benefit. 'Yeah, really killing the mood. You do it all the time.'

He was stunned.

'It's generally for a reason, you know.' He was getting a little angry now. Talk about defensive.

I shrugged, knowing it would only aggravate him further.

He huffed loudly, pinching the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger.

I knew I was being a little immature, but I didn't care. 'Your mind changes more often than Emmett with a remote and cable tv.'

Edward did not see my humour. Sour puss.

'You don't get it do you?' he asked, his voice was low, angry.

'What am I supposed to get?' I hissed back at him. I mean, I wasn't a mind reader.

'Don't fucking worry about it.'

'Well, if you're going to be like that,' I started snapping, gathering myself together and making the decision to leave him here in his sulking, 'well, fuck you too.'

Then I leave his bed, walk the short distance to his bedroom door and disappear without looking back.

Fucking Edward Cullen. _I think I hate him right now._

Well, I thought I hated him.

That was until I snuck back into Alice's bedroom. She was most definitely feigning sleep. I could tell from the over-exaggerated snores she was pulling.

I decided to nudge her. 'Alice.'

She pretended to groan in her sleep. 'What?'

I nudge her again. 'I know you have been awake this whole time.'

She sits up quickly, huffing. 'I thought that would get me an Oscar!'

I grin at her. 'Well, if you call that acting, don't bother.'

She frowned. 'Oh yeah, real nice Bella.'

'Yeah, I know.'

She shrugs, not sleepy at all. 'So where were you exactly?'

I momentarily thought about what to say. 'Uh, I was in Edward's room.'

She frowned again. 'What happened?'

I looked up quickly to dismiss the subject, hoping to worm out the information I needed through another conversation. 'We just talked a little.'

Alice's eyes focussed on mine with an eyebrow cocked slightly.

I shrugged. 'Talking and getting to know one another.'

She still had that sceptical look on her face. 'Right.'

I didn't know what to say. But I did know what I wanted to talk about. I needed to talk about why a guy would just blow off a girl while she sits on top of him. And also taking into account that the guy had made advances on the girl as well.

I just didn't want Alice to look into it and work out what was actually going on.

I probably should have just read a stupid magazine.

Maybe I would have gotten the whole 'he's-just-not-that-into-you' thing.

Stupid magazines and the shit they shove down people's throats.

Alice caught me mid-thought. 'What's wrong with you?'

I sigh, defeated.

'Alright, if I tell you, do you promise that it stays between us?'

She nodded. 'Yeah.'

'Okay, hypothetically...' I start, my eyes darting around the room anxiously, 'let's say that a girl meets a boy and it feels like they like each other right?'

Alice nodded, already putting two and two together in her head.

'But when it comes down to it, he's so hot and cold that the girl is just so confused. But when she thinks she finally cracks him, it just seems to open up something else.'

She looks back dumbly. 'Isn't that typical boy syndrome?'

I scoff at her. 'No, it's more than just the "commitment issues" bullshit. It's like he has something he's hiding and he won't tell me.'

She grins now. 'I thought this was hypothetical?'

'It is,' I sigh, 'Alice, what do you think?'

I watch as she plays with the hem on her pyjama shirt. 'Well, I think you need to take it slower maybe. The boy has still got some issues he has been trying to work out.'

I thought about that for a moment. 'That makes sense.'

'Just put yourself in his shoes,' she told me, extending a hand to touch my shoulder.

'How can I, when I have no idea what he's supposed to be going through.'

Alice just stared, unmoving. 'You'll find a way.'

I huffed, not happy with her vague answer. I turned away from her like a petulant child and decided it was time for bed.

I would deal with it in the morning.

_The morning._

Oh, the headache was ridiculous.

_Who can do this every weekend?_

We were sitting at the breakfast table. Yes they had a separate table for breakfast.

Esme had taken the liberty of making pancakes. The kind with copious amounts of syrup and butter. The perfect remedy for a hangover.

'Thanks Esme,' I said as she handed me my plate.

She smiled. 'You're welcome.'

I was determined to avoid the empty seat in front of me. It was where Edward should be.

He was in the shower and he would be down any moment.

And I was having trouble not thinking about him under the jet of hot water as it would cascade down- _oh, never mind_.

I was supposed to be angry with him.

Well, all those thoughts flew out of my head as he walked down the stairs and entered the dining room.

Esme fluttered over to him like a nesting bird. I admired the way she mothered him. She was inspecting a cut on his face. He had obviously made it while shaving. I smiled despite myself.

I so desperately wanted to be the one inspecting his face. I wanted to make sure he was okay.

_Goddamn, I'm supposed to be angry with him._

And he was watching me.

So I looked away.

Oh hell no, he was not getting out of this easily.

I was still angry with him. Well, I thought I was.

He took his seat before me. I tried in vain to avoid his piercing gaze.

_Why is he staring at me?_

And I found myself unconsciously returning his stare.

It didn't stop, even when his mother set his breakfast down in front of him. He didn't even look at the perfectly rounded and honeyed pancakes.

I shivered, silently willing his stare to stop.

I heard a loud clearing of the throat. Emmett obviously.

Edward was startled from his daze. He quickly looked down and started his breakfast.

I was mesmerised by the way he ate.

_It's sick, I know._

But I couldn't stop watching him, even when he looked up and raised his eyebrow in question.

I blinked twice, unable to look away.

He only snickered, shovelling the perfect stack of pancakes down.

He was so graceful about everything, even the way he chewed. He was not messy at all.

_Is he even human?_

I sighed, still watching him.

He finished his plate, turning his eyes to my half eaten stack of pancakes. 'Are you eating those?'

'No.' I handed the plate over to him, and he finished mine in just a few seconds.

I heard Emmett distantly groaning. 'I wish Rosie was here, she always lets me eat hers...'

There's a collective snickering around the table before Edward finishes and looks up to meet my eyes again.

It was awkward. It felt like there was something we needed to talk about. But I had no idea what that something was.

But he knew. 'I'm just going to hang out in my room.'

He spoke to the table, but his eyes never left mine. Even when he lifted both our plates from the table and took them to the sink in the kitchen, or when came back to ruffle Alice's hair and take off again.

I watched his retreating form make its way up the grand staircase.

I wanted to follow him. So I hopped up from the table, offered my services for cleaning, was declined graciously, and then left to trace his footsteps.

I knocked on the slightly open door as I entered his room. He was sitting on the edge of his bed, relaxed.

He looked up at me while he fiddled around with his iPod and docking station.

The song that I had left him listening to last night was playing.

'_Cos I stole your soul._

His eyes found mine and he sighed, it was full of some kind of grief.

_You said I would never be able._

I take a step closer, carefully watching him.

_But oh, the whole world is still on my string._

He didn't move, but relaxed a little when I took the space on the bed beside him.

Our bodies were touching.

'Bella,' he spoke softly, 'I'm not like Emmett or Jasper...'

He looked up at me and waited for my answer. 'I think that may be a good thing.'

He smiled, but it was without any humour. 'I don't just let people in for the sake of making friends or having a girlfriend.'

I had forgotten about any of my anger toward him. And I already knew about his coldness towards anyone else. 'Edward, I already know.'

He shook his head. 'You don't know why.'

I let out a gust of air. Was he about to let me in?

'I want to know.'

He stiffened. 'No you don't.'

I crossed my arms, determined. 'Yes, I do.'

'You'll wish I never told you. You won't want to know me after it.'

_What? _

'Well, just ease me into it then,' I offer him, 'you don't have to give me your life story right now.'

He smiled at this, a little more reassured. 'Okay then.'

_He's agreeing with me?_

'Look Bella, I don't just let any girl into my room at night, or ever,' he took in a long breath, slowly letting it back out, 'I don't do this often, actually never.'

I thought about his words for a second, finding it hard to believe he was perhaps just innocent as I was. 'Well, I don't either. I'm not the type to just walk into anyone's room in my underwear.'

Now I start cringing, remembering my bold move last night. I definitely did move a little too fast. 'Just for future reference,' I let the humour thread through my tone, 'alcohol wipes away any inhibitions I may have.'

He chuckled. 'I know what you mean.'

'Let's not get drunk again,' I suggested, noting that every time we drink too much, we end up doing something so out of character that we come to regret it so much the next morning.

'Let's not,' he agreed.

We sat there silently for a few short moments. 'Are you ready to let me in now?'

He smirked. 'Can you read my mind or something?'

'No.'

I wait for him to tell me something, anything.

'Alright,' he started, nervously tapping his foot to the beat of the music playing, 'I am so new to this that I don't know what I'm doing.'

I looked at him, mouth agape. 'But you're like a sex god.'

_Oh no, did I just say that? Mental note: burn Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging. An almost-eighteen-year-old shouldn't be watching that anyway._

And his musical laughter brought me out of my musings. 'But I haven't even had sex.'

It went dead quiet.

Then unexpectedly, I started laughing. Trust him to say that.

He looked back at me, confused. 'What did I say?'

I laugh harder. 'I'm laughing more at myself.' I manage to get out between my fits of chuckles.

After my embarrassing show, I quietened down and waited for him to speak again.

'I didn't mean to kill whatever it was last night, but I felt like continuing what we were doing would have brought about a negative outcome.'

I stared openly at him. '...A negative outcome?'

He sighed, knowing he had said the wrong thing. 'We weren't exactly sober.'

I crossed my arms anyway. 'Whatever.'

And then I felt his gentle touch on my arm. 'Don't be angry with me.'

I wasn't really angry with him, and I knew where he was coming from anyway.

'Well where are we going with this?' I asked him as he took his hand away.

He was silent for a while. 'I don't know.'

I lay back on his bed, my hair fanning out underneath me. Edward followed and our heads touched just slightly. 'It has to be a slow process for me,' I heard him say, 'it took me a while to get used to Esme and Carlisle, so it's just my nature to be a bit hesitant at first.'

I turned my head to face his. 'Okay.'

He was already looking at me. 'I guard things for a reason Bella.'

'I know, I think we all do in some way.'

His bronze hair fell around his face haphazardly as he lay there beside me, silently watching.

And the song was still playing on his iPod.

'_Cos I stole your soul._

'Edward, what is this?' I asked. He knew already what I was talking about.

'They're called Lydia,' he began, blinking a few times as he shifted a little, 'it's called This is Twice Now.'

I was surprised. 'I haven't heard of them before.'

He shrugged, his eyes never leaving mine. 'They're not exactly mainstream.'

'But they sound good.' I listened to the lyrics, taking it all in.

But before I could realise what was happening, Edward had come closer.

He was just inches away from my face now.

And I saw his eyes dart from my eyes to my lips. I waited in anticipation. And Edward kissed me. Again.

This time was a little different. There was no sense of urgency, just the feeling of acceptance as his soft lips caught mine.

He didn't bring his arms up to hold me. He didn't deepen the kiss. He just softly captured and then let go of my lips as our heads moved collectively, never leaving the surface of his bed.

I was accepting whatever he was willing to give.

We just didn't know what that was yet.

'_Cos I stole your soul._

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